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What
with
Works
Children
When and
Adolescents
A Handbook of
Individual Counseling
Techniques
Ann Vernon
Research Press
2612 North Mattis Avenue
Champaign, Illinois 61822
[800] 519-2707
www researchpress com
Copyright © 2002 by Ann Vernon
All rights reserved
Printed in the United States of America
8 7 6 5 4 07 08 09 10 11
In this volume, those materials accompanied by instructions that allow the reader
to photocopy them may be reproduced for noncom1nercial use by the original
purchaser only, not to extend to reproduction by other parties Excerpts may be
printed in connection with published reviews in periodicals without express per
mission No other part of this book may be reproduced by any means without
the written permission of the publisher
Copies of this bciok may be ordered from Research Press at the address given on
the title page
Composition by Jeff Helgesen
Cover design by Linda Brov..rn, Positive I. D Graphic Design, Inc
Printed by McNaughton & Gunn
ISBN-13: 978-0-87822-438-8
ISBN-10: 0-8 7822-438-6
Library of Congress Catalog Number 2002109730
Contents
Activities v
Foreword ix
Acknowledgments xi
Introduction 1
Chapter 1
Considerations in Wo1king with Young Clients 5
Developmental Considerations 6
Early Childhood 6
Middle Childhood 6
Early Adolescence 7
Mid-Adolescence 9
Implications of Developmental Stages 9
Relationship between REBT and Development 10
The Therapeutic Relationship 14
Building Rapport 20
Strategies for Building Rapport with Children
(Ages 5 to 10) 20
Strategies for Building Rapport with Adolescents
(Ages 11 to 18) 24
Establishing Goals 29
Chapter 2
Basic P1inciples of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy 31
Basic Principles: The ABC's of REBT 31
Irrational Beliefs 33
Disputation 34
Rational Beliefs/Moderation of Feelings and Behaviors 35
Specific Applications to Children and Adolescents 35
Problem Assessment 36
The ABC Process 50
Homework 63
Evaluation 64
iii
Chapter 3
Interventions for Internalizing Problems 67
Self-Downing 69
Anxiety 80
Perfectionism 94
Guilt 108
Depression 120
Case Study 139
Summary of Case Study 151
Chapter 4
Interventions for Externalizing Problems 153
Anger 155
Acting Out 170
Procrastination 182
Underachievement 196
Case Study 210
Summary of Case Study 217
Chapter 5
,~2.'
Interventions for Typical Developmental Problems 219
Relationships 221
Performance and Competition 242
Self-Consciousness 257
Ttansitions 270
Case Study 287
Summary of Case Study 290
Chapter 6
Applications for Parents and Teache1s 291
Problem Assessment 292
Identifying In ational Beliefs 294
Disputing Irrational Beliefs 300
Teaching and Parenting Styles 304
Authoritarian Style 304
Permissive Style 305
Authoritative Style 305
Solving the Practical Problem 306
Logical Consequences 308
Communication Techniques: What Doesn't Work
and What Does 309
Rational Emotive Education 312
Case Study 314
Summary of Case Study 317
Appendix: Game Board 319
References 323
About the Author 329
iv
Activities
Chapter 3: Interventions for Internalizing Problems
Self-Downing 69
If Who You Are Is What You Do 70
I Can, I Can't 71
This Package Is Valuable 72
Bur st or Bounce Back? 73
IAWAC 74
Don't Soak It Up 77
USA 78
A Good CD, One Bad Song 79
Anxiety 80
Anxious Albert 82
Adios, Anxiety 85
Feel Your Fears 87
Fraidy-Cat Frieda 88
A Is for Anxious, B Is for Behaving 90
A-A-Anti-Anxiety 91
Anxiety Attackers 92
Let It Go 93
Petfectionism 94
Perfect, Please 95
I'm Not Perfect 97
P Is for Perfect 98
Can't Be Perfect 100
Putting Perfect in Perspective 101
The Price of Perfection 103
A Preference for Perfect 104
Less-Than-Perfect Circles 106
v
Guilt 108
Goodbye to Guilt 109
Don't Beat Yourself Up 111
G Is for Guilt 112
Guilty but Sorry 114
Give Up Guilt 116
I'll Take Some Blame 117
Guilt 01 Regret? 118
Guilty as Charged 119
Depression 120
So Sad 122
Sick of Being Sad 124
Down the Drain 126
Silly Songs 129
When You Need a Helping Hand 131
How Low Do You Go? 132
Take a Sad Song and Make It Better 135
Done with Depression 136 ,,
~·'
Chapter 4: Interventions for Externalizing Probleriis'"'
Anger 155
Don't Pop Your Top 158
Stay Cool Is the Rule 159
The Anger Alarm 162
Angry Arnie 163
Anger Is and Isn't 165
Anger Alert 167
Adios, Anger 168
Attack That Anger 169
Acting Out 170
More of the Same 171
Away with Acting Out 172
Act Now, Pay Later 174
Step into Their Shoes 175
Actions Speak Louder Than Words 176
Awesome Actions? 177
Action Awareness 180
Account for Yorn Actions 181
vi
Prncrastination 182
Put It Off 183
Calling All Procrastinators 184
Procrastination Pointers 185
Now or Later? 186
Why Procrastinate? 188
Procrastination: Price and Payoff 190
Better Late Than Never 191
Paralyzing Procrastination 194
Underachievement 196
Poor Performance 198
Understanding Underachievement 199
Excuses, Excuses 201
The Road to Achievement 202
Underestimating Underachievement 204
Why 'Ily? 205
Underachievement Is Unauthorized 206
To Do or Not to Do 208
Chapter 5: Interventions for Typical Developmental
Problems
Relationships 221
Tuning Out Teasing 222
Fights with Friends 225
Rejected, Dejected 228
Words Will Never Hurt Me 230
Fickle Friends 232
Relationship Realities 235
Problems with Parents 238
Romantic Relationships 240
Perfmmance and Competition 242
I Have to Win 243
Making the Grade 245
Not a Complete Failure 248
Doing the Best I Can 250
Best of the Class 251
Pressure to Perform 252
Winning Isn't Everything 254
Pick Me 255
vii
Self-Consciousness 257
I Feel Strange 258
Keep My Mouth Shut 260
Being Shy 261
Ugly Duckling 263
In the Minor 264
So Ugly 267
Zoom In 268
Fitting In 269
Transitions 270
Moving On 271
Family Changes 273
Next Grade 275
Dealing with Divorce 2 77
Preparing for the Future 279
Times Are Changing 280
What's Next? 281
Get a Job 284
viii
Foreword
I enthusiastically endorse Ann Vernon's book on individual counseling
interventions with children and adolescents. I think that it is easily the
most comprehensive and practical book that exists on how to apply
rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT) to emotionally and behav
iorally troubled youngsters Oh, yes-and, by all means, to the parents
of these youngsters, too.
There have been other books that nicely apply REBT to children
and adolescents, including Bill Knaus's (1974) pioneering presentation,
Rational-Emotive Education; my 1983 anthology with Michael Bernard,
Rational-Emotive Approaches to the Problems of Childhood; a fme book
by Michael Bernard and Marie Joyce (1984), Rational-Emotive Therapy
with Children and Adolescents; Jerry Wilde's (1992) Rational Counseling
with School-Aged Populations, Michael Bernard's (2001) Program
Achieve; as well as important previous programs by Ann Vernon, such
as Thinking, Feeling, Behaving An Emotional Education Program for
Children and Adolescents (1989a, 1989b) and The Passport Program: A
Journey through Emotional, Social, Cognitive, and Self-Development
(1998a, 1998b, 1998c) None of these texts, however, covers the scope
of materials that Ann Vernon herewith presents to therapists, teachers,
and parents who are willing to devote themselves to aiding troubled
youngsters.
First of all, Ann describes the special considerations that practi
tioners need to take into account as they apply REBT to young clients
As she points out, these methods are quite different in many respects
from those that are used to apply individual counseling to adults, and
she gives a number of suggestions that almost any kind of child coun
selor can effectively employ She then clearly and accurately states the
basic principles of REBT and their application to children and adoles
cents Counselors who are relatively unfamiliar with REBT are effi
ciently introduced to it in Ann's presentation.
Following the first two chapters, Ann provides examples of special
interventions for children's and adolescents' emotional problems,
behavioral difficulties, and typical developmental issues In these core
chapters she not only tells counselors exactly what they can do to help
clients, but also includes a considerable number of interventions that '
she her self has creatively invented that can be used effectively with
young clients The many REBT techniques she presents include
ix
descriptions of rational and irrational beliefs; the disputing of irra
tional beliefs in language that youngsters can easily understand; the
use of appropriate homework assignments; the employment of ration
al emotive imagery, role playing, and other experiential and emotive
evocative methods; a host of special exercises, activities, games,
visuals, and sentence completions; serious and humorous stories,
songs, and an assortment of similai tools that counselors can use; and
many other down-to-earth procedures that aie common to REBTers
and, for that matter, can be employed by therapists following other
kinds of therapies
I found particulai ly valuable the many verbatim therapeutic tran
scripts that Ann has included in most of the chapters While she was
writing this book, Jerry Wilde and I were editing another book, Case
Studies in Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy with Children and
Adolescents (2001), which includes a transcript of a case by Ann. If
readers want to see exactly what REBT counselors say to troubled
youngsters, they can find ainple illustrations of this material in this
book as well as in Je ny Wilde's and my compilation of case studies
A final note: Ann's unusually good book tends to substantiate my
original hypothesis that REBT can be used effectively, in relative)y few
sessions, with moderately and more seriously disturbed childre.iil<_~d
adolescents. As presented by Ann and appreciably helped by het fine
examples, rational emotive behavior therapy will, I predict, continue
to grow in populaiity through the 21st century and beyond .. Thank
you, Ann, for making this fine contribution to it
Albert Ellis, Ph. D
President
Albert Ellis Institute
x
