Very Nice Ways to Say Very Bad Things: An Unusual Book of Euphemisms

157 Pages·2007·10.7 MB·English

by  Linda Brdol

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Are you tired of hearing those same
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seven naughty words again and again? y Very Nice Ways to Say

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Did you Welcome to a world of truly polite e VERY BAD THINGS
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know that there is ways to say the worst.
an obscene gesture a
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that is both older and Euphemisms serve a greater purpose s
more universally than merely keeping the ladies at a gar- t An unusual book of euphemisms
recognized than digitus den party from glaring at us over the o
impudicus? top of their spectacles. A few mincing
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Do you words can also keep lawyers at bay. This a
know subtle art of the insult can exact y

what digitus revenge without fear of retribution.
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impudicus is?
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Very Nice Ways to Say Very Bad Things
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is also chock full of obscure facts about
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And just common terms. It will be impossible

what is BB
for readers to find a page that doesn’t
the Clinton AA
enlighten or delight.
Exculpation? DD
Why is an
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Likewise HH
improcreant
excrementum A II
male called NN
cerebellum shitepoke?
vincit? a mule? GG
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$12.95 U.S./ B
$16.95 CAN/£6.99 UK ISBN-13: 978-1-4022-0885-0 e
Humor ISBN-10: 1-4022-0885-5 r
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Linda Berdoll
www.sourcebooks.com
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Very Nice Ways to Say
Very Bad Things
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Very
ice
ways
to say
Very
Things
An UnusualBook of Euphemisms
by
Linda Berdoll
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Copyright © 2003, 2007 by Linda Berdoll
Cover © 2007 by Sourcebooks, Inc.
Internal design © 2003 Carol Sue Hagood
Internal graphics © 2003 Carol Sue Hagood and Johnny Alvarez
Sourcebooks and the colophon are registered trademarks of Sourcebooks,
Inc.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or
by any electronic or mechanical means including information storage and re-
trieval systems—except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical
articles or reviews—without permission in writing from its publisher,
Sourcebooks, Inc.
Published by Sourcebooks Hysteria, an imprint of Sourcebooks, Inc.
P.O. Box 4410, Naperville, Illinois 60567-4410
[phone]
Fax: [phone]
www.sourcebooks.com
Originally published in 2003.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Berdoll, Linda
Very Nice Ways to Say Very Bad Things / Linda Berdoll
p. cm.
IISSBBNN--1133: 9: 7987-81--410-2420-20828-25-9083-1
IISSBBNN--1100: 1: -14-042022-028-8259-583-6
1. English language—Euphemism. 2. English language—Jargon.
3. English language—Terms and phrases. I. Title.
PE1449.B4435 2007
427—dc22
2006100787
Printed and bound in the United States of America.
WC 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
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Contents
A
spersions, brickbats, carping, cavil, censure, denunciation,
disparagement, reproach, opprobrium, reproof, stricture,
1v
vitriol, epithets, and vituperation
Censuring the Inherent Fool: The Lost Art 3
Shakespeare,Addressing Individual
Mounds of Foul,Undigested Lumps
of Donkey Entrails 19
Sacre Bleu: Profanities and
Expletives 21
Oaths and General
Vituperation 27
Silent Disparagement
(The Bird and His Friends) 30
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C
ircumlocution 33
Worshipping at the Shrine
of Bacchus 49
F
its, disease, ill health, infirmity, breakdowns, affliction, ailment,
attacks, bugs, collapse, complaint, confinement, convalescence,
v
disability, disorder, disturbance, dose, failing health, flu,
indisposition, malady, malaise, prostration, seizure, syndrome,
53
a bit of unwell, and what’s been going around
Indisposition 55
Going to Europe with Ralph
and Earl in a Buick 56
In the Privy 65
Afflicted by Time’s Wing’d
Chariot 69
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G
ender specific activity, femininity, manhood, manliness,
masculinity, sexuality, womanhood, womanliness, intercourse
between animate beings, coition, coitus, copulation, fornication,
generation, intimacy, lovemaking, magnetism,procreation,
73v
relations,reproduction,sensuality,sexuality
Bewitched, Bothered
and Betwattled 75
The Long Carbine 80
Dallying, Firkytoodling
and Finkdiddling 83
Sex “Sain et Sauf” 102
Men Behaving Badly 107
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A Pea in the Pod 109
Misbegotten 110
Unknown to
Man 112
Trafficking with
Oneself 114
D
aft, mentally strange, barmy, unzipped, batty, berserk,
insane, bonkers, cracked, loony, crazed, cuckoo, demented,
v
deranged, peculiar, erratic, flaky, fruity, idiotic, insane,
lunatic, mad, maniacal, nuts, potty, psycho, touched,
135
unbalanced, unglued, unhinged, wacky
The Gazelles are in
the Garden 137
’N What? 142
Acknowledgements 144
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spersions, brickbats, carping, cavil,
censure, denunciation, disparagement, reproach,
opprobrium, reproof, stricture, vitriol, epithets,
and vituperation