The Time at Which an Apology is Given Affects Willingness to Forgive

160 Pages·2014·1.58 MB·English

by  Erinn Squires

Moving Beyond Betrayal: How Meaning-Making and Power Promote Forgiveness
Following Infidelity

by
Erinn C. Squires

A dissertation submitted to
the Faculty of Graduate and Postdoctoral Affairs
in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree

Doctor of Philosophy
in
Psychology

Carleton University
Ottawa, Ontario

©2014 Erinn C. Squires
MEANING-MAKING, POWER, AND FORGIVENESS

Abstract
The current research sought to better understand how forgiveness may be fostered
following infidelity. To do so, participants completed questionnaires assessing meaning-
making and forgiveness. In Study 1 (N = 330), results revealed that people who found
meaning in their experience of infidelity were more willing to forgive their romantic
partner than people who were not able to find meaning. This effect was moderated by
relationship status. Meaning only predicted forgiveness for those who remained in the
relationship post-infidelity. Study 2 (N = 67) was a conceptual replication of Study 1,
however, participants’ perceived power in their relationship and attributions for the
unfaithful behaviour were also assessed as possible mediating mechanisms. Once again,
people who remained in the relationship were more forgiving of the infidelity when they
found meaning. Attributions for the unfaithful behaviour did not mediate this effect, but
as predicted, perceived relationship power did – meaning increased perceived power,
which increased forgiveness. To assess the causal direction of the observed effects, I
attempted to manipulate meaning (Study 3; N = 104) and relationship power (Study 4; N
= 113). The extent to which participants reported finding meaning and having power
within their relationship was positively associated with forgiveness. However, neither of
the manipulations was effective. It was determined that meaning and power might not be
easily manipulated after someone has experienced infidelity. As such, in Study 5 (N =
225) a hypothetical scenario was used to manipulate meaning and power (i.e.,
participants who were in a relationship were asked to imagine that their partner
committed infidelity). Both manipulations were successful. People in the meaning found
condition reported greater forgiveness than people in the no meaning condition. People in
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MEANING-MAKING, POWER, AND FORGIVENESS

the high power condition expressed greater forgiveness forgive than people in the low
power condition. However, meaning and power did not interact to predict forgiveness.
Results of the current research suggest that meaning and power are each unique
predictors of forgiveness in the aftermath of infidelity. The implications for individual
recovery and relationship repair following infidelity, as well as future directions for
research are discussed.

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Acknowledgments
I would like to take this opportunity to express my gratitude to Dr. Michael Wohl.
As both my MA and PhD advisor, your guidance and support over the past seven years
has been invaluable. You have encouraged me to step outside my comfort zone in order
to accomplish things I did not think were possible and you continue to provide advice and
direction when I need it most – for this I am truly grateful.
To my committee members, Dr. Chris Davis, Dr. Johanna Peetz, Dr. Susan Boon,
and Professor Neil Sargent, thank you for your insightful questions and feedback during
this process.
I would also like to thank everyone in, and gone from, the Wellness Labs. Having
the support of others who are dealing with similar challenges and accomplishments is
vital, and I value the times when no one was actually working the most! Jess and Melissa,
you have both given me tremendous support throughout every aspect of this process and I
am lucky to have found amazing friends like you!
To my parents, it has been a long road and I cannot possibly express how
appreciative I am of your support, encouragement, and patience. You’ve been cheering
me on my whole life and for that, thank you.
Lastly, to Andrew, we met at the start of this journey and you have been here for
me through all the ups and downs. You can tell exactly when I need a boost, and exactly
when I need your patience and easygoing outlook – thank you for always knowing.

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Table of Contents
Abstract ............................................................................................................................... ii
Acknowledgments.............................................................................................................. iv
Table of Contents ................................................................................................................ v
List of Tables ................................................................................................................... viii
List of Figures .................................................................................................................... ix
List of Appendices .............................................................................................................. x
Transgressions in Relationships: The Harmful Consequences ........................................... 3
Romantic Relationship Transgressions: The Case of Infidelity ................................. 6
Recovering from Trauma: Finding Meaning .................................................................... 10
The Search for Meaning............................................................................................ 11
Forgiveness ....................................................................................................................... 16
Defining Forgiveness ................................................................................................ 16
The Positive Effects of Forgiving for the Victim and the Relationship ................... 18
Meaning-Making as a Possible Antecedent of Forgiveness ..................................... 20
Overview of the Current Research .................................................................................... 24
STUDY 1 .......................................................................................................................... 25
Method .............................................................................................................................. 25
Participants ................................................................................................................ 25
Procedure .................................................................................................................. 26
Measured Variables .................................................................................................. 27
Results ............................................................................................................................... 28
Preliminary Analyses ................................................................................................ 28
Moderation Analyses ................................................................................................ 33
Qualitative Examination of Meaning-Making .......................................................... 36
Discussion ......................................................................................................................... 36
STUDY 2 .......................................................................................................................... 39
Power ................................................................................................................................ 40
Attributions for Partner Behaviour ................................................................................... 45
Methods............................................................................................................................. 47
Participants and Procedure ........................................................................................ 47
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MEANING-MAKING, POWER, AND FORGIVENESS

Measures ................................................................................................................... 48
Results ............................................................................................................................... 50
Preliminary Analyses ................................................................................................ 50
Mediation Analysis ................................................................................................... 52
Alternative Model ..................................................................................................... 53
Discussion ......................................................................................................................... 54
STUDY 3 .......................................................................................................................... 55
Method .............................................................................................................................. 56
Participants ................................................................................................................ 56
Procedure and Measures ........................................................................................... 57
Results ............................................................................................................................... 59
Preliminary Analyses ................................................................................................ 59
Meaning Manipulation – Analysis of Variance ........................................................ 61
Mediation Analyses .................................................................................................. 62
Discussion ......................................................................................................................... 63
STUDY 4 .......................................................................................................................... 65
Method .............................................................................................................................. 66
Participants and Procedures ...................................................................................... 66
Results ............................................................................................................................... 68
Preliminary Analyses ................................................................................................ 68
Power Manipulation – Analysis of Variance ............................................................ 70
Mediation Analyses .................................................................................................. 71
Discussion ......................................................................................................................... 71
STUDY 5 .......................................................................................................................... 74
Method .............................................................................................................................. 74
Participants and Procedures ...................................................................................... 74
Results ............................................................................................................................... 76
Preliminary Analyses ................................................................................................ 76
Meaning and Power – Analysis of Variance............................................................. 77
Discussion ......................................................................................................................... 79
General Discussion ........................................................................................................... 79
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Implications............................................................................................................... 85
Limitations ................................................................................................................ 89
Conclusion ........................................................................................................................ 92
Appendices ...................................................................................................................... 112

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List of Tables
Table 1. Type of Infidelity Experienced and Current Relationship Status by
Condition 26
Table 2. Descriptive Statistics for Finding Meaning, Benevolence, Avoidance,
and Revenge Motivations by Relationship Group 32
Table 3. Bivariate Correlations for Finding Meaning, Benevolence, Avoidance,
and Revenge Motivations by Relationship Group 32
Table 4. Type of Infidelity Experienced and Current Relationship Status 48
Table 5. Descriptive Statistics for Finding Meaning, Perceived Power,
Attributions, and Forgiveness 51
Table 6. Percentages of Type of Infidelity Experienced and Current Relationship
Status 57
Table 7. Descriptive Statistics for Presence of and Search for Meaning,
Perceived Power, and Forgiveness by Condition 61
Table 8. Percentages of Type of Infidelity Experienced and Current Relationship
Status 67
Table 9. Descriptive Statistics for Presence of Meaning, Perceived Power, and
Forgiveness by Condition 70
Table 10. Means and Standard Deviations of Variables of Interest by Sex 77
Table 11. Descriptive Statistics for Presence of Meaning, Perceived Power, and
Forgiveness by Condition 77

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List of Figures
Figure 1. Simple slopes for finding meaning and benevolence motivations in
Study 1. 34
Figure 2. Simple slopes for finding meaning and avoidance motivations in Study
1. 35
Figure 3. Simple slopes for finding meaning and revenge motivations in Study 1. 36
Figure 4. Mediation model for meaning found and forgiveness in Study 2.
Coefficients with an asterisk indicate significant beta weights, p < .05.
Coefficients with a double asterisk indicate significant beta weights, p <
.001. 53

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List of Appendices
Appendix A. Recruitment Notices 112
Appendix B. Informed Consents 115
Appendix C. Measures 123
Appendix D. Manipulations 141
Appendix E. Debriefings 145
x