Table Of ContentThe Messages We Send
The Messages
We Send
Social Signals and Storytelling
G.R.F. Ferrari
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To Zebedee
who could never have read this book
but helped me write it
Preface
Thisisabookaboutsocialinteractionsthatapproachoutrightcommu-
nicationbutdonotquitereachit.Itsbackboneconsistsinacommunica-
tivescaleorswitch,whichgoesfrom‘off’(nocommunicationintended)to
fully ‘on’ (outright communication), with most of the interest concen-
tratedonthestagesbetweenthosetwoextremes.Thebookbeginswitha
gently theoretical chapter that borrows an account of communication
from contemporary philosophy of language and uses it to cash out the
metaphorofacommunicativescalewiththreepositions:off,half-on,and
fully on. Subsequent chapters apply the theory. First comes the half-on
position,forwhichIintroducetheterm‘intimation’.Intimationtendsto
bemorediscreetthanoutrightcommunication.Naturally,then,itplaysa
largeroleinourmanagementofhowothersseeus.InChapter2,Imine
oneespeciallyrichveinofimpression-managementinsociallife:howwe
dress. It turns out that, although we can dress at each of these three
positions on the communicative scale, with the switch off, half-on, or
fully on, the switch for dress is much more often either half-on or off
than it is fully on. Tempting though it is to think of our clothes as
‘makinga statement’,true communication with clothes is rare. Most of
themessageswesendwhenwedress,wesendasintimations.Chaptertwo
investigateswhythisshouldbeso.
Uptothatpoint inthebook,thereaderhasbeenaskedtoimaginea
communicativescale with onlythreepositions.Butthentheplotthick-
ens.(Andsincethebookisnotinfactastorybutanargument,Iwillgo
ahead and spoil the surprise for the reader here.) In the course of
chaptersthreeandfour,wecometounderstandthattwomorepositions
need to be added to the scale: the ‘quarter-on’ and ‘three-quarters-on’
positions. These too are kinds of intimation, which by that point has
becomemytermforeverytransactionbetween‘off’and‘fullyon’.Both
ofthemhaveanelementofcovertness,unlikeintimationatthehalf-on
position. Intimation at the quarter-on position is entirely covert: it is
directed atan audience, butconcealsthatfact.Itiscommon enoughin
dailyuse,sinceweoftenseektoimpresswithoutwantingtobedetected
in the attempt. It belongs somewhere between the off and the half-on
viii PREFACE
position. The three-quarters-on position, by contrast, is one that mixes
the overt with the covert, in such a way as to reach out to an audience
more fully than a half-on intimation does. Nevertheless, it still falls
shortofoutrightcommunication.Onceagain,dailylifecontainsmany
examples—often conditioned by politeness or by self-protectiveness—and
Ibeginchapterthreebyapplyingmyanalysistothese.Themaingoalofthe
chapter, however, along with its elaboration in chapter four, is to show
how the very same pattern that applies to the three-quarters-on intim-
ationsweuseindailylifeappliesalsototheintimationsthatstorytellers
make to their audiences in the established narrative arts. An investiga-
tion of the quarter-on position, which does not come until the second
sectionofchapterfour,isincludedforthesakeofcompletenessandfor
the artistic parallel it enables me to draw. The parallel is not with the
narrativeartsthistimebutwithlyricpoetry,whichturnsouttoexemplify
the same pattern of quarter-on intimation. But my focus throughout
chapters three and four remains on intimation at the three-quarters-on
positionandonhowitisexemplifiedbystorytelling.
Inevitably,thesetwochaptersdohavesomethingtosayaboutstorytell-
ingassuch,andtussleonoccasionwiththelargephilosophicliteratureon
thetopic.Butwhatevercontributiontheymaketothestudyofnarrativeis
secondary;theyareouttoconvinceyou,aboveall,thattransmissionsatthe
same position on the communicative scale have the same underlying
structure,regardless ofwhether they are madein thearts orin daily life
outsideofthearts. Nevertheless,thatidentity ofstructureisnot without
implicationsforwhatstorytellingisandwhatitspurposesmightbe.
Chapterfiveisashortcodatothetreatmentofstorytellinginchapters
three and four. It looks to occasions when the whole world can seem
intimative,canfeellikeastory—situationswetendtocall‘ironic’.Andit
concludes that, despite appearances, such ironies anchor us after all in
themessagelessmundane.
The book has been nourished by a selection of relatively technical
writinginthephilosophyoflanguage,specificallyinthefieldsof‘speech-
acttheory’andof‘pragmatics’thattheworkofPaulGricedidmuchto
inspire.Butitisnotitselftechnicalandisnotintendedasacontribution
tothoseacademicfields.Itismoreathomeinsocialphilosophyandin
aesthetics.Inanycase,Istrivethroughout tobesimple anddirect.You
donotneedtoknowanyphilosophytoappreciatethisbook;allyouneed
isaninterestinitsphilosophicthemes.
Contents
Acknowledgements xi
1. Intimation 1
2. DressedtoCommunicate—OrNot 13
3. StorytellingasIntimation:TheModelPresented 65
4. StorytellingasIntimation:TheModelDefendedandRefined 113
5. SituationalIrony:TheWorldMadeIntimative 166
Bibliography 179
Index 185
