Table Of ContentDedication
In loving memory of my mother,
Franzi Toch Weschler,
whose strength always amazed me.
Contents
Dedication
Acknowledgments
Preface to the 20th Anniversary Edition
Introduction
Part One BREAKING FERTILE GROUND: TOWARD A NEW WAY OF THINKING
1. Fertility Awareness: What You Should Know and Why You Probably Don’t
2. Taking Control of Your Reproductive Health
Part Two REDISCOVERING YOUR CYCLE AND YOUR BODY
3. There’s More to Your Reproductive Anatomy Than Your Vagina
4. Finally Making Sense of Your Menstrual Cycle
5. The Three Primary Fertility Signs
6. How to Observe and Chart Your Fertility Signs
Part Three BEING PROACTIVE WITH YOUR HEALTH
7. Anovulation and Irregular Cycles
8. Three Prevalent Conditions All Women Should Be Aware Of: Ovarian Cysts, Endometriosis, and PCOS
9. Natural Ways to Balance Your Hormones
10. Now That You Know: Preserving Your Future Fertility
Part Four NATURAL BIRTH CONTROL
11. Natural Birth Control Without Chemicals or Devices
12. Shortcuts: Minimum Charting with Maximum Reliability
Part Five PREGNANCY ACHIEVEMENT
13. Maximizing Your Chances of Getting Pregnant
14. Practical Tips Beyond Fertility Awareness
15. What Next? Tests and Treatments That May Be Necessary to Get Pregnant
16. Dealing with Miscarriages
17. Idiopathic Infertility: Some Possible Causes When They’re Not Sure Why
Part Six BEYOND FERTILITY: PRACTICAL BENEFITS OF CHARTING YOUR CYCLE
18. Maintaining Your Gynecological Health
19. Causes of Unusual Bleeding
20. Appreciating Your Sexuality and Nurturing Your Relationship
21. Premenstrual Syndrome: You Mean It’s Not All in My Head?
22. Demystifying Menopause
23. Enriching Your Self-Esteem Through Knowledge About Your Body
Epilogue—A History of Progress: Women’s Health and the Missing Piece of the Puzzle
Color Insert
APPENDIXES
BASIC INFORMATION FOR ALL READERS
A. Troubleshooting Your Cycle: Expecting the Unexpected
B. Frequently Asked Questions
C. The Menstrual Cycle: A Summary of Events Through the Use of the Proverbial 28-Day Model
NATURAL BIRTH CONTROL
D. The Contraceptive Effectiveness of Natural Birth Control
E. The Difference Between Natural Methods of Birth Control
F. Birth Control Rules When You Can Only Chart One Fertility Sign
G. Checking Cervical Fluid Internally Before Ovulation
H. Tricky Coverlines
I. Using FAM While Breastfeeding
J. Using FAM During Long Cycles and Phases of Anovulation
PREGNANCY ACHIEVEMENT
K. A Brief Look at Gender Selection
L. How to Research Fertility Clinics
MISCELLANEOUS RESOURCES
Fertility-Related Resources
Glossary
Bibliography
Index
Annual Exam Form
Master Chart Options
Professional Praise
Excerpts from Letters to the Author
About the Author
Also by Toni Weschler
Credits
Copyright
About the Publisher
Acknowledgments
They say women are blessed with the ability to forget the pain of childbirth so they will be able to have more
children later. I often wonder whether the same principle applies to the challenges of writing a book of this
magnitude. Had another author warned me about what a monumental task it would be, I’m not sure I would have
been so insane as to pursue the dream. And even now, revising the book for the third time since the book was first
released 20 years ago, I am struck once again with the age-old question: “What were you thinking?”
But I suppose writers are a deluded bunch, or perhaps their memories are simply fried from their projects! Either
way, I’ve come away from writing both the original and revised editions having experienced the gamut of human
emotion, from total frustration and burnout to incredible joy and pride. Along the way, as the following list will
attest, I’ve had the privilege of being supported by numerous people to whom I owe a debt of gratitude.
To my wonderful editor at HarperCollins, Emily Krump, for sticking with me during this arduous process and
graciously advocating on my behalf. I hope that now that the revision is finally finished, you’ll be able to take pride
in your involvement in this incredibly challenging project. And to the wizards in the production department, Heather
Finn and Susan Kosko, for putting up with all of my crazy-making instructions to assure that this book is once again
as appealing and user-friendly as possible.
To my literary agent, Joy Harris, who has been with me since the beginning over 20 years ago, as well as to her
amazing cohort in crime, Adam Reed, who saved me from myself when I just about had a breakdown trying to
convert my original manuscript to one which I could revise on my Mac. He never ceases to amaze me with how
professional and responsive he is to my questions. I’ve never worked with anyone else who e-mails me back before
I’ve even hit the Send button!
To the numerous doctors, health practitioners, and professors who had a part in making this book what it is,
including Vivien Webb Hanson, M.D., Joan Helmich, Lee Hickok, M.D., Patricia Kato, M.D., Nancy Kenney,
Ph.D., Miriam Labbok, M.D., Chris Leininger, M.D., Mark Perloe, M.D., Molly Pessl, B.S.N., Suzanne Poppema,
M.D., and especially Rebecca Wynsome, N.D., whom I would like to single out for being especially helpful in this
project and providing invaluable professional expertise. And to Thomas W. Hilgers, M.D., for his unparalleled
contributions to the field, and for his assistance as I navigated the often confusing world of reproductive health.
To my medical illustrators, Kate Sweeney and Christine Shafner, for their gorgeous visuals. And to my graphics
illustrator, Rosy Aronson, for her beautiful artwork, including the pregnant woman in the color insert. Her incredibly
positive attitude made it a pleasure to work with her. And to Sheila Metcalf Tobin, the artist of the lovely vulva and
g-spot drawings in the color insert, for beautifully illustrating for women just how unique their bodies are.
To my medical photographer, Frankie Collins, who had the perfect disposition to be on call every time a cervix
model phoned to inform her that their cervix or cervical fluid was at just the right phase to be photographed.
To the woman whom I ultimately chose for her incredibly photogenic cervix, Deanna Hope, who was so proud
of her contribution to the enlightenment of women that she wanted to be mentioned by name.
To my incredible assistant for the first revised edition, Cricky Kavanaugh, my total godsend, whose intelligence,
ingenuity, and attention to detail were surpassed only by her warmth and wonderful sense of humor. I feel privileged
that she came into my life, and even though she moved across the country, I hope I’ll have the joy of working with
her again one day. Regardless, I hope her young daughter Clara will one day appreciate the many contributions her
special mom made to the book.
To my various university interns I had who helped me maintain a semblance of sanity while working on this
revision, including Amy Cronin, Maddie Cunningham, Olivia Eisner, Alana Macy, Anna Rourke, and Lisa Taylor-
Swanson. And to Ruby Booras, who I want to single out for helping me come up with the perfect name to replace a
rather clunky term in the sexuality chapter. ’Nuf said.
To Sheila Cory, Robin Bennett, Kim Aronson, and Ana Carolina Vaz, who all rescued me when they saw that I
had that deer-in-the-headlight look. Was it really that obvious?
To Sarah Bly, who gave me the idea for the “fertile wave.” And to Michal Schonbrun, Ilene Richman, Katie
Singer, Geraldine Matus, and Megan Lalonde, all of whom have also contributed immeasurably to the dissemination
of FAM into the secular mainstream. And to a new generation of excellent Fertility Awareness instructors who are
passionately moving the field forward, including Colleen Flowers, Kati Bicknell, and Hannah Ransom.
To Kelly Andrews, Ethan Lynette, Suzanne Munson, Sarah Dohman, Whitney Palmerton, Lester Meeks, and
Jake Harsoch, all of whom have been a joy to work with. Thank you for welcoming me so warmly!
To the scores of clients and readers who continue to swell my “Thank You” file with their poignant letters of
gratitude for the ways my book has apparently changed their lives. It is this type of appreciation which buoys me
when I occasionally feel disheartened by a medical community which has yet to fully grasp the scientific validity
and endless benefits of the Fertility Awareness Method. And to those who took the time to write me the most
eloquent and touching letters expressing how the book impacted their lives to such an extent that they changed
careers—especially to Alyssa Mayer for earning her Ph.D. in public health!
To my cherished friends who witnessed me go from a fairly gregarious and amiable person to a hermit who
rarely came up for air while working on this edition. You helped me maintain a sense of perspective when I kept
wondering whether I would ever have a life again. Especially Aud, Cath, Susan, and Sandy.
To Roger, who more than anyone, has had to peel me off the floor countless times when I thought the end would
never arrive, and who sacrificed his personal space by negotiating around stacks of research studies, all manner of
women’s health illustrations and copy-edited manuscripts, only to eat on the kitchen bread board lest he disturb any
of the color-coded stacks. Without his understanding support for months and months on end—heck, who am I
kidding, years on end—I would never have been able to complete this book. So thank you, thank you, thank you.
To my two older brothers, Lawrence Weschler, whose remarkable literary achievements gave me the inspiration
to write this book, and Robert Weschler, for being my own devil’s advocate who kept me constantly on my toes.
Finally, and most important, to my younger brother, Raymond, without whom I could never have written this
book. And even though we often rued the day that we ever started working together on this daunting project over 20
years ago, he was an indispensable editor, researcher, and organizer, as well as an endless source of wit and moral
support throughout this undertaking. The fact is that we talked about sharing authorship credit, but he insisted that
the book came from my passion and experiences, not his, and ultimately it was written with my voice. Perhaps, but
truth be told, Raymond was my co-writer. I am eternally grateful to him for all he’s done, and most especially, for
once again agreeing to work with me on this latest edition. In so doing, he showed that despite all the grief we’ve
given each other, determined siblings can get things done that no family counselors would’ve ever thought possible!
The publisher and author do not guarantee the method of birth control or pregnancy achievement described in
these pages. As a contraceptive method, it is highly effective, but only when the relevant instructions are strictly
followed. Like other effective contraceptive methods, this method is not foolproof, and there is a chance that the
method will fail. The ideal way to learn about the Fertility Awareness Method is through a qualified instructor or
counselor. In addition, it should be clear that natural methods of contraception do not offer protection of any kind
against AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases.
This book does not purport to take the place of qualified medical advice and treatment. Thus, any application
of the recommendations set forth in the following pages is at the reader’s own risk. Please contact your doctor, a
Fertility Awareness instructor, or both whenever appropriate. While every effort has been made to provide the
most accurate and updated information, the publisher and author cannot be responsible for any error, omission, or
dated material.
The anecdotes presented in this book are true and accurate. However, except when requested, the names have
been changed to maintain anonymity.
Preface to the 20th Anniversary Edition
When I first wrote Taking Charge of Your Fertility 20 years ago, women had rarely heard of the concept of charting
their menstrual cycles. The idea that they could use the information they gleaned from charting to practice effective
natural contraception, maximize their odds of getting pregnant, and finally take charge of their gynecological and
sexual health was completely foreign. So my goal was to spark a grassroots movement among women frustrated
with the lack of practical information they were taught about their bodies. As I had hoped, the material contained in
these pages struck a chord with hundreds of thousands of women.
In the years since Taking Charge was first released, I’ve been humbled by the effusive reactions women have
had toward the book. So many readers have written me personally to say how this information has changed their
lives—they’re incredibly excited and encouraged but also often equally frustrated that this information was not
shared earlier either in school or during doctor visits.
Which raises an important key to understanding the book. Through teaching practical knowledge about women’s
menstrual cycles, it may have appeared that I was disparaging doctors in the process. So let me set the record
straight: Given the obvious demands of physicians’ responsibilities as well as the limited time they can spend with
their patients, it would be impossible for any doctor to know the intimate details of your cycle, and that’s especially
true if you yourself don’t know them! TCOYF is in large part about learning how to be able to advocate for yourself
so you can work with your doctor, for at its heart, this book centers on the concept that knowledge is power.
It is also important to keep in mind that Taking Charge has been written for women with divergent objectives—
those who want to avoid pregnancy and those who want to get pregnant. Because of this, the book is structured to be
read both as a whole and as individual chapters when a situation or need arises. As a result, you may find that some
key information is repeated. This is to highlight the importance of those topics, but also to ensure readers are fully
educated even if they use only a portion of the text. Ultimately, the ability to understand your reproductive and
gynecological issues throughout your life is truly empowering.
My hope is that even if you have read an earlier edition of this book, you will now benefit from this new 20th
anniversary edition of Taking Charge. Generally speaking, women’s cycles have remained the same across time, but
our understanding of the underlying biology has continued to improve. So, for those who already own an earlier
version, you will find numerous additions and modifications throughout, including:
• an expanded 16-page color insert
• improved fertility charts
• a revised and updated chapter on the extensive advances taking place in assisted reproductive
technologies (ART)
• a more detailed sexuality chapter for both you and your partner
• six new chapters, including:
~ Three Prevalent Conditions
All Women Should Be Aware Of
~ Natural Ways to Balance Your Hormones
~ Now That You Know: Preserving Your Future Fertility
~ Dealing with Miscarriages
~ Idiopathic Infertility: Some Possible Causes When They’re Not Sure Why
~ Causes of Unusual Bleeding
The way in which women learn about their bodies and chart their cycles continues to evolve, just as our biological
knowledge and reproductive technology do. And so, with this latest edition of Taking Charge, I hope to keep apace
of these changes so that each new generation of women will continue to be more educated, more self-aware, and
simply more cycle-savvy than the one before.
For additional information, forums, and the Taking Charge of Your Fertility charting app, please visit
www.tcoyf.com.
—Toni Weschler, MPH, 2015
