Table Of ContentCONTENTS
FOREWORD
CHAPTER 1
STRESS IN PERSPECTIVE
HOW STRESS AFFECTS YOUR BODY AND MIND
What is stress?
What it is, and what it isn’t
Naturally stressed
A necessary part of life
Can stress be good for us?
A boost to the system
Acquiring resilience
Bend but don’t break
The body’s alarm system
The physiology of stress
Identify your stressors
Finding the problem spots
Coping mechanisms
Getting some control
Stressed by nature?
Personality and pressure
Taking it like a man?
Men, women, and stress
Perfectly imperfect
The relief of realistic standards
Self-compassion
Becoming your own comforter
Writing it out
Keeping a stress diary
Am I worth it?
Stress and self-esteem
Finding meaning
Making stress worthwhile
Feeling in control
Understanding our limits
Breaking the worry cycle
Dealing with uncertainty
De-stress your thinking
The power of CBT
How stressed?
Between discomfort and danger
CHAPTER 2
A CONSTANT COMPANION
STRATEGIES FOR DEALING WITH LONG-TERM STRESS
Pressures of today
Is life more stressful than ever?
Tackling technostress
Coping in the digital age
Balls in the air
The stress of multitasking
Mirror, mirror
Body issues
Secure in love?
Stress and relationships
Not tonight, honey
Sex and intimacy
Pressures of parenthood
Creating a calm home life
In the workplace
Pressure to perform
Job burnout
Knowing when to stop
The pressure to spend
Managing your money
Money worries
Surviving debt and insecurity
Assert yourself
Learning to draw the line
Speaking up
Asking for what you want
Stop crowding me!
Coping with busy spaces
In green places
The time-honored cure of nature
Music and silence
The ear as healer
Stress and older people
Growing old gracefully
Always there for you
How to be a stronger caregiver
Letting things go
The power of forgiveness
Giving thanks
How gratitude can lower stress
CHAPTER 3
STRESS IN THE MOMENT
TROUBLESHOOTING TACTICS FOR SHORT-TERM STRESS
Turning points
Stress in times of change
The big day looms
Handling performance anxiety
At odds with others
Managing the stress of conflict
I can’t stand it!
How to deal with frustration
When love ends
Breakup and divorce
Life after loss
How to deal with bereavement
Learning to face facts
Acceptance and commitment
Breathe in, breathe out
Breath control remedies
Learning to loosen up
Progressive Muscle Relaxation
Take a moment
Mindfulness and meditation
Let’s celebrate
Making holidays less stressful
I need a drink
Stress and alcohol
Avoiding avoidance
How to stop stress ruling you
Staying well
Stress and ill health
CHAPTER 4
DE-STRESSING YOUR LIFE
CREATING A CALMER EXISTENCE
Too much on your plate
How to prioritize
Balancing act
How to juggle work and home
Why free time counts
The value of leisure
Fighting fit
The role of exercise
The walking cure
How to de-stress with a stroll
Mindful movement
De-stressing with yoga and tai chi
Stress and food
Eating under pressure
A good night’s sleep
Beating insomnia
The simple life
Decluttering home and habits
Strong enough
How to manage your willpower
Resisting old habits
Staying firm under pressure
Total immersion
The art of finding flow
The human safety net
Friendship and support
Positive talk
The benefits of avoiding complaints
Seeing the funny side
The role of humor
Get creative
Beating stress with arts and crafts
The power of pets
The calming effects of animals
All on your own?
The stress of loneliness
The art of grit
Persistence and passion
CHAPTER 5
RESILIENCE AND RESOLUTION
FINDING SUPPORT AND BUILDING STRENGTH
I don’t feel well
The physical symptoms of stress
Big bad wolf
Overcoming an abusive childhood
Taking care
Mental illness facts and fiction
Under a gray cloud
Low mood and depression
Managing fears
Four anxiety disorders
Lifeboat ahoy
Could a therapist help?
Holding steady
Living a resilient life
Sources and bibliography
Acknowledgments
Copyright
FOREWORD
A
ge, race, gender, money—nothing can shield us from having to face
stressful situations that might feel difficult, even impossible, to
overcome. Nor should they, because stress is an essential part of life. Any
experience or situation that makes you feel threatened or overwhelmed is a
“stressor.” Good stress helps you to focus on your goals and complete
important tasks. Without stress, we would fail to achieve our greatest
accomplishments, because the ones we value most are usually stressful and
require a great deal of effort. Bad stress isn't productive and can halt your
advancement and dampen your spirits. This book will help you master life's
stressors, good or bad, with greater ease—not by eliminating stress, but by
building on your strengths and encouraging the development of new
coping skills.
The five chapters that follow are based on a careful review of the most
recent and important scientific research, which has been translated to be
relevant and helpful for anyone who wants to feel better able to manage
their stress. When you’re trying to overcome life’s challenges, particularly
the more stressful or unpleasant ones, understanding how your body and
your brain react, and how you can influence that reaction, can help you to
feel a greater sense of control. Chapter 1 focuses on just that, by defining
stress and explaining how your body reacts physically and emotionally to
scary situations. These pages will help you determine why you feel
stressed, which is the first step toward taking control.
We all have our own ways of dealing with stress, but there are some simple
yet powerful proven coping techniques—and by understanding their pros
and cons, you will be able to choose the strategy that's right for you. How
you manage stress must work for you, so that you can develop a realistic,
practical plan that fits your own needs.
In Chapter 2, you'll see that you are not alone in feeling stressed when
