Table Of ContentDEDICATION
To my mother, Marie, and late grandmother, Kathleen
Grace.
Thank you for making me every bit of the woman
I humbly am today.
To my daughter, Reagan.
Being your mommy is the absolute greatest joy of my life.
I hope I live and leave a legacy that will inspire you always.
To the thousands of women who have trusted
me to counsel, coach, and mentor them.
Your resilience inspires me daily.
PCW
CONTENTS
DEDICATION
INTRODUCTION
SECTION 1: CREATE WEALTHY HABITS
Money Mindsets, Attitudes & Myths
I deserve it
It was an emergency
I bought it on sale
A couple bucks never hurt anyone
If I made more money, this would be easier
I’ll start later
I don’t make enough to save
I don’t know anything about money
It’s good debt
I’m just a giving person
Wealth Begins Within
What the heck is a financial blueprint, anyway?
My parents didn’t teach me anything about money. Now what?
How do I start changing the way I think about money?
What can I do to create wealthier habits?
Where do I find the motivation to change my habits?
I have so much fear around financial matters. How do I get over that?
Setting the Foundation
What is personal finance, really?
What if I’m not really a finance type of person?
What is the most important financial principle I should know?
How do you define wealth?
How do I set financial goals I can achieve?
Why should I care about what’s going on in the economy?
What other resources should I use to get control of my finances?
SECTION 2: EARN MORE MONEY
Workplace Wisdom
Why haven’t I found my dream job?
What can I do to get noticed for the job I want?
How do I negotiate a higher salary?
What does my personal life have to do with my professional life?
How do I avoid workplace drama?
Isn’t it true that mean girls make more money?
How do I know when it’s time to find new employment?
Get Your Hustle On!
How could I possibly start a business and keep working?
How am I supposed to balance a job, a side-business, and a family?
How do I even know what I’m good at?
How can I begin making money from my hobby?
What if I’m just not the “salesy” type?
What can I do to market my business?
What are the basic business lessons I should know?
How can I network effectively?
You Are Your Best Investment
How can I afford personal development when I’m broke?
I’ve tried lots of self-help systems. Why hasn’t anything worked?
What’s the difference between a mentor and a coach?
Should I go back to school if I already have debt?
Is it possible to avoid student loans if I go back to school?
What’s the real difference between grants and scholarships?
What should I do with a financial aid refund check?
How can I take advantage of loan forgiveness?
SECTION 3: MANAGE MONEY WISELY
Get It Together!
What documents should every woman have on hand?
How can I keep my finances organized?
How long should I keep financial documents?
What software do you suggest for managing money effectively?
What professionals should I have on my financial team?
How do I choose the right professionals for my personal finance team?
Budgeting Effectively
Why do I really need a budget?
How do I differentiate between needs and wants?
Why is budgeting so freakin’ hard?
How do I make a budget the right way?
How do I know if I’ve created a realistic budget?
Can you explain the concept of living by percentages?
What if I have inconsistent income?
Will my creditors really move my due dates to fit my personal budget?
Saving and Reducing Debt Simultaneously
What’s the difference between short-term and long-term savings?
How much do I actually need to have saved?
Seriously! How can I possibly save six months of income?
I’ve heard of an emergency fund, but what is an opportunity fund?
If I save on my own, do I still need my employer’s retirement plan?
You’re insane! How could it be possible to save too much or pay down too
much debt?
Aren’t there forms of good debt?
Is it okay to buy stuff while I’m still in debt?
What is a debt eliminator, and how do I determine my debt-free date?
What’s your take on payday loans?
How do I know if I should just file bankruptcy?
I’ve already filed bankruptcy. Now what?
I’ve pretty much paid off all my debt. Now what?
Isn’t buying a home a great investment and savings tool?
The Fundamentals of Banking
What’s wrong with using check cashing centers?
How do I know my money is not safer with me than in a bank?
What’s the real difference between a credit union and a bank?
What’s the difference between a checking and savings account?
What should I look for in a checking account?
What should I look for in a savings account?
Where’s the best place to save my opportunity fund?
How do I stay away from ATM machines?
How do I avoid overdraft fees?
Can I open a new bank account if I owe money to another bank?
Why can’t I just use pre-paid cards?
Boosting Credit
How do I obtain a copy of my credit report?
What information should I expect to see on my credit report?
What should I do if there are items on my credit report I don’t recognize?
What’s a credit score, and how is it determined?
What’s the difference between installment debt and revolving debt?
What’s the difference between a credit card, charge card, and debit card?
What Should I Do If I’m Terrified of Credit Cards?
What about department store credit cards? Good or bad?
Can I build or rebuild credit without credit cards?
How do I begin to clean up my credit now?
How do I keep the credit cards I have in good standing?
Should I close a credit card once I pay it off?
What should I say once I get my creditor on the phone?
What should I do if I’m being harassed by a creditor?
How do I prevent identity theft?
SECTION 4: RELATIONSHIPS AND MONEY
Your Honey, Your Money
What are the warning signs of a financially irresponsible person?
Are there questions I should ask about money while we’re dating?
I prefer to date men with money. Does that make me a gold digger?
What should I do if discover my mate is fundamentally bad with money?
How can I make my man better with money?
I make more money than my man. Why do I feel like he can’t handle that?
Each time my mate and I discuss money, things get tense. How can we get
through this?
How do we decide who should manage the money?
I chose to stay home with the kids. Do I still have a right to be involved with
the money management?
Should couples share bank accounts?
Do you suggest I keep a secret stash my partner knows nothing about?
At what point should I accept that the money issues have completely ruined
our marriage?
How do I recover financially after a divorce or break up?
Friends & Family or Financial Foes
How can I tell if I’m financially enabling someone?
How does co-signing a loan for someone else affect me?
Should I lend money to friends?
What’s wrong with borrowing money from my friends or relatives every
once in a while?
How do I deal with girlfriends who have it all?
I think my friends are taking advantage of me financially. How do I protect
myself, but keep the friendships?
How do I find the courage to say no to a loved one that needs help?
I said no, and now my loved one isn’t speaking to me. What next?
Kids & Money
How can I make sure my young children have fun learning about money?
When and how do I give my children an allowance?
I think I may have entitled children. Can this be changed?
You really think kids should work?
What should I be doing to make sure my child can attend college debt-free?
How can I say no to my adult child?
APPENDIX A
APPENDIX B
APPENDIX C
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
CREDITS
COPYRIGHT
ABOUT THE PUBLISHER
INTRODUCTION
THIS IS BIGGER THAN YOU
I must have appeared confident and in control as I took the stage at the kickoff of
the Act Like a Success tour to face the largest audience I’d ever addressed. Hair
and makeup flawless, I looked pulled together and self-assured, but my knees
felt like they could buckle at any moment. More than six thousand men and
women who wanted to do more with their lives, people who wanted to have
more purpose, more fulfillment, and more material success, sat at attention.
I’ve done a lot of speaking over the last several years, but this moment was
surreal. I was the opening act to the man who had once been my boss when I was
just a college intern. I shared my story and some specific strategies, and as I left
the stage, applause lingered behind me. I was enjoying the satisfaction of
knowing I’d touched people, inspired them to believe in their potential, and
given them tools to take ownership of their financial well-being, when I ran into
the man they’d all come to see. I’d just opened for the founder of the
Neighborhood Awards, nationally syndicated radio host, television personality,
and media mogul Steve Harvey.
He’d chosen me, the little girl from South Central, Los Angeles, a
neighborhood infamous for illegal drugs, street gangs, and civil unrest following
the Rodney King verdict, to speak on the main stage of his premier event. He’d
chosen me to teach people how to shift their money mindsets. It was a far cry
from where I had come from in South Central, and a long way from my situation
six years earlier, lying on my bathroom floor, crying and feeling guilty and
ashamed because everything we’d earned and built was gone.
My husband and I were young up-and-comers, building our “empire”
together, when the 2008 recession hit. And it hit us hard. Our seven-figure real
estate business closed its doors, leaving sixteen employees out of work at the
worst possible time. We lost all the investment properties we’d accumulated and
faced foreclosure on our home. We had to turn in those matching Range Rovers
we enjoyed driving. Things got so bad so quickly, I considered pawning my
wedding ring to make ends meet. When all was said and done, we went from
living in a six thousand square-foot home in Southern California to a six hundred
square-foot apartment in Metairie, Louisiana. It was a long, hard, and fast fall.
You might say I lost everything in the 2008 recession, and I did lose all of
my material wealth. But I still had my skills and education, the work ethic my
mother instilled in me at a young age, my ability to build relationships, my
steadfast husband, and my determination to do my part to take care of our
family. Most of all, I had the knowledge that rebuilding my wealth would begin
by facing reality, owning up to the choices that led me to this financial downfall,
strengthening my positive money attitudes, and rejecting the money myths that
so many people were falling for in the face of similar setbacks.
I reflected on the part I’d played in our downturn, and I worked to build an
unshakable money mindset, allowing me to make the most of all those other
gifts. In that state of humility, my previous passion for financial education also
developed into a deeper sense of compassion for the money struggles I saw so
many people fighting to overcome.
During that dark time, I took what work I could find to bring in some cash.
The jobs weren’t always pleasant, but I learned something from each one.
Whether it was a new skillset, a new relationship, or some new knowledge I
would later use to build my own business, I stayed alert and took home more
than a paycheck. I continued to nourish and strengthen my money mindset with
positive affirmations, personal and professional development, and a network of
people who believed, as I do, that we all have the power to improve our
circumstances.
My family doesn’t live in that tiny apartment anymore, and I no longer worry
about whether or not I’ll have enough money to put food on the table, but it was
not an easy journey. It took work. It took sacrifice, but since that setback, just six
years ago, I’ve built a career as a speaker, coach, and personal-finance educator.
I’ve written three books and published articles in Black Enterprise, the
Huffington Post, and numerous other publications. I’ve been interviewed by
Forbes, SUCCESS magazine, and Bloomberg Television, to name a few. I’ve
spoken on several radio shows and landed a regular segment on The Steve
Harvey Morning Show, sharing the mic with the people I once served as a
college intern. I’ve even stepped onto the set of The Steve Harvey Show to share
