Persuasion Equation: The Subtle Science of Getting Your Way

257 Pages·2015·1.2 MB·English

by  Mark Rodgers

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Persuasion Equation
The Subtle Science of Getting Your Way
MARK RODGERS
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Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Rodgers, Mark, 1965-
Persuasion equation : the subtle science of getting your way / Mark Rodgers.
pages cm
Includes bibliographical references and index.
ISBN 978-0-8144-3417-8 (pbk. : alk. paper) — ISBN 0-8144-3417-7 (pbk. : alk. paper) —
ISBN 978-0-8144-3418-5 (e-book : alk. paper) 1. Negotiation in business. 2. Persuasion
(Psychology) 3. Success in business. 4. Decision making. I. Title.
BF637.P4R53 2015
303.3'42--dc23 2014042351
© 2015 Mark Rodgers.
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Printing number
10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
To my precious wife, Amy;
all things are possible because of you.
American Management Association • www.amanet.org
C O N T E N T S
Foreword by Alan Weiss vii
Acknowledgments x
Introduction 1
1 Persuasion Fundamentals
The Basics You Need to Know, and Why You Need to Know Them 5
2 Decision Making
The Surprising Reasons People Say Yes and No 25
3 Targets, Technology, and Tactics
Because It’s Not About You, It’s About Them 46
4 Building Your Business Case
Creating the Logical and Emotional Foundations of Your Argument 65
5 The Credibility Crucible
How You Get It, Why You Lose It, and How You Win It Back 92
6 Power Language
Verbal and Nonverbal Communication Tools to Skyrocket Your Success 106
7 Persuasive Processes
A Five-Step Sequence to Yes 128
8 Persuasion 360
How to Get Agreement, Up, Down, and All Around 145
v
American Management Association • www.amanet.org
vi Contents
9 Persuasion 911
What to Do When Your Persuasion Attempts Go Awry 162
10 Yes Success
What to Do When Your Target Agrees (and Why Most People Don’t
Get This Right) 175
11 Your Persuasion Action Plan
How to Get a 10,000:1 Return on Your Investment in This Book 189
12 The Psychology of Self-Persuasion
The First Person Who Needs to Say Yes . . . Is You 203
Bibliography 217
Index 219
About the Author 230
Free Sample Chapter from Just Listen
by Mark Goulston 232
American Management Association • www.amanet.org
F O R E W O R D
I vividly remember a phone call in 1985, when a woman I didn’t know
asked if I was Alan Weiss.
“Yes, I am,” I said.
“And do you own a Mercedes 450 SLC?” she asked.
“Yes, I do,” I admitted, expecting perhaps a factory recall advisory.
“Well, how would you like to own one of the very first car phones
in New England?” she prompted.
“I’m free this afternoon,” I said, and I acquired a hard-wired hand-
set, which was the first of the phones in every car I subsequently owned
until the advent of cell phones.
I remember this so clearly because it was the last “cold call” pur-
chase I ever made, and because it was so elegantly simple. Today, we’d
call that series of questions and answers “consistency,” since it relies on
a continuing affirmative response. I simply called it “Wow!”
Persuasion takes many forms, but the underlying principles are
clear: We should seek commitment, not merely compliance; speed is
highly desirable (the longer you wait, the more bad things happen); and
finding others’ self-interests and adapting to them is essential.
Mark Rodgers is the expert in persuasive powers. He is a veteran
consultant, working with major corporations. He’s a previously pub-
lished author. And he’s a superb coach. In this book, he’s distilled the
key techniques to galvanize others and marshal their support. You’ll
learn in the pages that follow that there’s a momentum in passion that
can be maneuvered in your favor, just as an expert in martial arts can
move a larger opponent using the other’s momentum.
Too many managers believe that they are trying to convince when
they are actually trying to coerce. They seek to influence behaviors
rather than change beliefs. Their thinking is self-centered rather than
vii
American Management Association • www.amanet.org
viii Foreword
other-centered. Hierarchical power can command but not necessarily
persuade. These are subtle but powerful distinctions, which the reader
can ignore only at great peril.
We see the lessons every day. A president and Congress at an im-
passe, with no one seemingly able to reach a compromise. Yet we know
it’s possible within either party, since both Ronald Reagan and Bill Clin-
ton were superb at finding the grounds to enact legislation with bipar-
tisan support. We seem to live in a polarized world, where there are
“social media” but not “business media,” and people are encouraged to
take sides and take up causes rather than take an open view and find the
means to make things work. The “social” aspect of social media seems
to be entirely false.
How important is persuasion amid these trends? I’ve been consult-
ing for 30 years and visited 60 countries, and I’ve never seen an orga-
nization with unhappy employees and happy customers. I’ve never
failed to see unhappy customers persuade others notto patronize their
object of dislike. Yet, I’ve often stood at Fifth Avenue and 60th Street
in New York City to watch 1,000 people line up to get the very first of
a new line of Apple products, which they could get at their leisure if
they just waited a month. (And I’ve marveled at the Apple employees
who emerge before the store opens to offer the crowd juice and snacks.)
Every day we are required to influence, recommend, cajole, nudge,
suggest, advise, and threaten. We engage in these activities proactively
to build consensus and support. We throw ourselves in reactively, be-
cause we’ve been wronged or tricked or had a march stolen on us. Pol-
itics, advertising, entertainment, health care—you name it, they rely on
persuasion. Smoking has been reduced substantially, because the public
has been persuaded both through education and appeals to personal
needs (such as living to enjoy your grandchildren and not killing family
members through secondhand smoke).
Persuasion can be macro or micro. The techniques and approaches
Mark provides are brilliant because they are pragmatically useful every
day. They can be used with coworkers or family members, in civic meet-
American Management Association • www.amanet.org
Foreword ix
ings or service settings. They are ubiquitous and powerful, yet stun-
ningly simple to apply.
I invite you to enjoy the journey ahead, hoping that I’ve whet your
appetite and persuaded you to pay close attention. I can’t imagine the
day when I wouldn’t want to have a phone in my car, and I still thank
that wonderful saleswoman who knew how to help me. Read on, and
allow Mark to help you.
—Alan Weiss, Ph.D., author of 55 books, including
Million Dollar Consulting andThrive!
American Management Association • www.amanet.org