Once Upon A Time In Carrotland: My YouTube Autobiography Which I Definitely Wrote All Of

133 Pages·2021·1.908 MB·English

by  Josh Carrott

Josh Carrott
O U A T I
NCE PON IME N
C
ARROTLAND
MY YOUTUBE AUTOBIOGRAPHY
WHICH I DEFINITELY WROTE ALL OF
ONCE UPON A TIME IN
CARROTLAND
JOSH CARROTT
Compass-Publishing UK
Once Upon A Time In Carrotland © Josh Carrott & Ollie Kendal
Published by Compass-Publishing UK 2021
Ghost-written by Ollie Kendal.
Ghost-ghost-written by Jenny Lee and Andy Brierley.
Ghost-ghost-ghost-written by a team of writers on Fiverr who cannot be
named but specialised in erotic fiction. Ollie didn’t know this when he made
the order, but they were very pleasant and, to be honest, did a pretty
good job considering the bizarre job they were tasked with.
Cover artwork © Ben Thomas 2021
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored
in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means
(electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise), without
the prior written permission of the publisher.
Excepting the below, all other text and images copyright © Josh Carrott &
Ollie Kendal 2021
Photograph of burning swan in Caterham Station is adapted from “A 4 EPB
on the Southern Region standing at Caterham railway station in 1984.” by
Phil Richards
CC BY-SA 2.0 https://www.flickr.com/people/13035092@N00
For Ollie Kendal, my best friend.

Contents
A A
BOUT THE UTHOR
1 T B S
HE URNING WAN
2 “M B W D U A !”
UTANT ABY ILL ESTROY S LL
3 M I C F
Y MAGINARY ARROT RIEND
4 P F
ATRICIA EATHERBOTTOM
5 M ’ S
OTHER S WORD
6 Y
ULETIDE
7 Q
INGDAO
8 L R
EGUMASAURUS EX
9 A
CCEPTED
10 D T
INWIDDY OWERS
11 M O
EETING LLIE
12 S A
TUDYING BROAD
13 H B
APPY IRTHDAY
14 P W
RANK AR
15 G
RADUATION
16 D
AUXCITED
17 S Y T
TARTING OU UBE
18 H Y E S A B S ?
AVE OU VER EEN ABY QUIRREL
19 G
ABIE
20 R T ’ O N ’ B W ’
OAD RIPPIN N OTHIN UT ENDY S
21 A E P
N PIC ROPOSAL
22 JOLLY
23 A P I C
ROPHECY N ARROTLAND
24 T G B P
HE REATEST IRTHDAY RESENT
25 A U
N NVEILING
A
CKNOWLEDGEMENTS

ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Joshua Daryl Carrott was born in 1988 and raised in Caterham,
Southern England, and then Qingdao, Eastern China. It was at
international school in Qingdao that he developed a love for Korea,
having been befriended by fellow Korean students. He is married to
Gabie Kook, and they live in London with their adorable dog, Brie. Josh
spends most of his time making silly videos with his best friend, Ollie
Kendal.