NLP at Work

392 Pages·2009·2.28 MB·English

by  Sue Knight

Exam Copy Not for Resale (c)NBP
Exam Copy Not for Resale (c)NBP
Praise for
NLP at Work
“This book may help you to understand life more clearly.”
Paul Smith, fashion designer
“The definitive volume on the topic... an excellent introduction... a clear,
thoughtful structure. The style of writing is realistic and practical and it
is easy to become immersed in the book.”
Personnel Today
“A jargon-free approach, featuring exercises, examples and action tips to
show how to use NLP techniques, to accelerate learning and enhance
creativity, communication and influence.”
People Management
“Should be on the bookshelf of any NLP student.”
Training Management
“NLP at Work outlines NLP in a business setting. Understanding how
your behaviour influences the responses of those you deal with can be the
key to modifying attitudes and establishing rapport.”
The Guardian
“The clearest book on NLP that I have come across. It is easy to read,
relevant and insightful.”
Management Training
“Recommended heartily for its good visual presentation, jargon-reduced
descriptions and lots of fine examples of NLP at work in the workplace.
It’s a great place to start.”
NLP World
Exam Copy Not for Resale (c)NBP
The business agenda at the start of the twenty-first century focuses on working with change
and developing people’s potential and performance. The People Skills for Professionals series
brings this leading theme to life with a practical range of self-development and human
resource guides for anyone who wants to get the best from their people.
Other titles in the Series
LEADING YOUR TEAM THE NEW NEGOTIATING EDGE
How to Involve and Inspire Teams The Behavioral Approach for
Second edition Results and Relationships
Andrew Leigh and Michael Maynard Gavin Kennedy
MANAGING TRANSITIONS COACHING FOR PERFORMANCE
Making the Most of Change GROWing Human Potential
William Bridges and Purpose
Fourth edition
John Whitmore
MEDIATION FOR MANAGERS
Getting Beyond Conflict to Performance
John Crawley and Katherine Graham
Exam Copy Not for Resale (c)NBP
NLP at Work
The essence of excellence
Third edition
Sue Knight
Exam Copy Not for Resale (c)NBP
This third edition first published by
Nicholas Brealey Publishing in 2009
First edition published in 1995
3-5 Spafield Street 20 Park Plaza, Suite 1115A
Clerkenwell, London Boston
EC1R 4QB, UK MA 02116, USA
Tel: [phone] Tel: (888) BREALEY
Fax: [phone] Fax: [phone]
www.nicholasbrealey.com
www.sueknight.com
© Sue Knight Books & Talks Ltd 1995, 2002, 2009
The right of Sue Knight to be identified as the author of this work has been
asserted in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.
ISBN: 978-1-85788-529-3
British Library Cataloguing in Publication Data
A catalogue record for this book is available from the
British Library.
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a
retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic,
mechanical, photocopying, recording and/or otherwise without the prior written
permission of the publishers. This book may not be lent, resold, hired out or
otherwise disposed of by way of trade in any form, binding or cover other than
that in which it is published, without the prior consent of the publishers.
Printed in Finland by WS Bookwell.
Exam Copy Not for Resale (c)NBP
Contents
Preface to the Third Edition vii
1 What is NLP? 1
Part I The Elements of NLP 10
NEURO 16
2 Thinking patterns 18
3 Filters on your world 32
4 Thinking with your body 48
LINGUISTIC 65
5 Enriched communication 67
6 Clean questions 79
7 Metaphor: The key to the unconscious mind 91
8 Precision questions 104
9 Hypnotic language 120
PROGRAMMING 134
10 Modeling 136
11 Strategies for successful living 152
Part II Model Yourself with NLP 164
12 Tap into your inner potential: Anchoring 168
13 Align yourself: Levels of influence 186
14 Write your own lifescript: Beliefs of excellence 210
Exam Copy Not for Resale (c)NBP
vi NLP AT WORK
15 Achieve what you really want: Well-formed
outcomes 240
16 Carpe diem: Time 262
Part III Lead with NLP 275
17 Develop a climate of trust: Rapport 279
18 Negotiate your way through life: Perceptual
positions 298
19 Resolving conflict: Parts integration 320
20 Giving and receiving feedback 329
21 High-performance coaching 344
22 Heal through humor 364
Glossary 378
Acknowledgments 380
Taking your learning further 381
Exam Copy Not for Resale (c)NBP
Preface to the Third Edition
I
t is over a decade since I wrote the first edition of NLP at Work. It has traveled the world
since then and is available in 14 languages. I have followed in its footsteps: to the US,
Turkey, Madagascar, Denmark, Sweden, Finland, Portugal, Belgium, France, Canada,
Australia and, most especially today, India.
The title NLP at Workis deliberately ambiguous. NLP works in all contexts: in business
as in the home, in relationships with others as much as in relationships with oneself, in
the world of marketing, IT and finance just as in the arts, sports and leisure. I pioneered
the use of NLP in business, and writing the first edition of this book was instrumental in
this, as I sought to make it accessible to people in business as well as in life as a whole. It
has long since achieved this goal.
In the 20 years since I first heard the term Neuro Linguistic Programming, it has
become the core of my work and my life. I could not have predicted the way my life would
unfold when I stumbled across it. I am lucky to do what I love, celebrating excellence
through my training, talks, coaching and writing. I have studied and learnt from many
models of excellence, both famous, such as Brian Keenan, Heston Blumenthal and Paul
Boateng, and not so famous, such as the father of one of the SOS children’s villages, home
to many children orphaned or abandoned in India, and an 82-year-old cycling veteran
who is still winning races and cycling 200 miles a week no matter what the weather. I
coach many leaders in business and, more importantly, I learn from them all.
WHAT IS NEW?
Every chapter in this latest edition has a new slant to it. The chapter on metaphor includes
more ways of eliciting and working with metaphor as the language for change. The
section on modeling includes more cross-cultural examples and nonverbal ways of
modeling excellence. The significance, purpose and application of clean questioning are
included alongside precision questions so that each enhances the other. And I incorporate
something that has been present in the way NLP has been taught for years and yet is so
obvious that it has often been overlooked: humor and provocative therapy. I have also
written new material on how we represent time and how we can use that representation
to enrich our experience in the present.
Exam Copy Not for Resale (c)NBP
viii NLP AT WORK
I am aware that many NLP trainers use NLP at Work as their course material, as do I.
To help with this, I have included more summary checklists with steps for students in the
chapters on outcomes and perceptual positions. Over the years NLP has been
misunderstood and misused, specifically through an overemphasis on technique. We
have looked too much at the finger rather than what the finger is pointing at. To redress
the balance, I have simplified some of the original chapters on techniques.
However, the main reason for a third edition is that what I wrote in both the first and
second editions I now view and use with the seasoning of age, faith and experience. I have
appreciated applications and nuances that were limited by my immaturity when I wrote
that first draft all those years ago. And the world has changed. The only things that are
certain are uncertainty and mortality, and NLP has been a means for me to learn to live
with both. If I were to prioritize the learning I encourage in my students, it is the ability to
embrace a state of unknowing, to live in the present and to open themselves with every
pore of their body to feedback.
I am often asked if NLP translates into other cultures. I reply, “It is about culture – our
individual and collective culture.” NLP is a means of respecting and embracing difference.
When asked recently how I “sell” NLP to other cultures, I replied, “I don’t!” I use NLP to
learn about the beauty and uniqueness of other cultures and to help those whose culture it
is to learn about the structure of what they have in a way that enables them to share it fully
with others.
What I want you to gain from reading this new edition is a sense of wonder and
mystery – there is always more to learn. If you finish the book with more questions than
answers, if something touches you and you feel emotions well up, if the hairs on the back
of your neck stand unexpectedly on end or your face starts to flush, if you are inspired to
know and experience more, then my writing will have been a success.
Let me now get out of the way and allow you to get on with your reading. You will
find lots more on my website, www.sueknight.com, where you have the opportunity to
let me know what you think. I value your opinions.
Sue Knight
September 2009
Exam Copy Not for Resale (c)NBP