Mothers and others : Australian writers on why not all women are mothers and not all mothers are the same

256 Pages·2015·8.18 MB·English

by  Kon-yu

About Mothers & Others
‘When are you having children?’
‘Why didn’t you have another child?’
‘Well, I guess that’s your choice, but …
They are questions asked of women of a certain age all the time. Beneath them is
the assumption that all women want to have children, and the judgement that if
they don’t, they’ll be somehow incomplete.
And that’s only the beginning …
Being a mother, or not being a mother, has never been so complicated. The list
of rights and wrongs gets longer daily, with guilt-ridden mothers struggling to
keep on top of it all, and non-mothers battling a culture that defines women by
their wombs.
In this collection of fiction and non-fiction stories, Australian women reflect on
motherhood: how it should be and how it really is. Their stories tackle
everything from the decision not to have children to the so-called battle between
working and stay-at-home mums. Including special contributions by Rosie Batty
and Deborra-lee Furness, the stories explore every topic from infertility and IVF,
to step-parenting and adoption, to miscarriage and breastfeeding, child
meltdowns and marriage breakdowns, as well as giving much-needed voice to
those who won’t ever be called ‘Mum’.
With its unflinching honesty and clear-eyed wisdom, Mothers & Others holds a
mirror up to the most romanticised, demonised and complex roles women play:
those of mother or non-mother, and daughter.

Cover
About Mothers and Others
Introduction
The New Grandparents
Nonfiction by Alice Pung
The God Box
Nonfiction by Brita Frost
Mothers
Nonfiction by Deborra-lee Furness Writing Gully
Nonfiction by Simmone Howell
On the Bus
Fiction by Maggie Scott
Future Brooke
Nonfiction by Brooke Davis
Interior. Kitchen Table. 10.45 am.
Nonfiction by Cate Kennedy
Why I Choose to Not Have to Make a Choice
Nonfiction by Celeste Liddle
Thirty Seconds
Nonfiction by Rosie Waterland
As a Mum
Nonfiction by Christie Nieman
Mothering in a Time of Fear
Nonfiction by Shakira Hussein
Main Street
Fiction by Miriam Sved Grief
Nonfiction by Debra Adelaide
The Motherhood Penalty
Nonfiction by Dianne Blacklock
Other People’s Kids
Nonfiction by Emily Maguire
Motherland
Nonfiction by Estelle Tang
The Storm
Nonfiction by Frances Whiting
Twelve Years of Looking After Luke
Nonfiction by Rosie Batty, as told to Maggie Scott Goat Song
Fiction by Kathleen Mary Fallon
The Childless Side of the Room
Nonfiction by Liane Moriarty
Paint
Fiction by Maxine Beneba Clarke
the Mother Lode
Nonfiction by Geraldine Brooks
Of a Lesser God
Nonfiction by Melina Marchetta
The Cuckoo Clock
Fiction by Maya Linden
The Disappearing Woman
Nonfiction by Natalie Kon-yu
What to Expect When You’re Someone’s Favourite Colour
Nonfiction by Jessica Rudd
No Fixed Position
Nonfiction by Enza Gandolfo
The Mother and Her Ghosts
Nonfiction by Sue Gillett
About the contributors
Acknowledgements
Also by the editors
Copyright page

W
hen are you having kids? It’s a question asked of women all the time and
seldom asked of men. A question that fails to consider the differences between
women – social, psychological and physical – and assumes motherhood is the
ultimate goal to which all women should strive.
The last few decades have seen social changes with enormous implications for
traditional parenting roles. In Australia, the rise of women in leadership
positions, improved medical technology, better parental leave, same-sex parents,
changing attitudes towards stay-at-home fathers, and an increase in women
actively deciding to remain childless are just a few of the things that have
challenged traditional ideas about motherhood in our culture. Yet traditions die
hard and these changes arouse public debates which frequently descend into
antagonism and judgement, once again limiting and polarising women.
Complexity, difference and truly unique positions of motherhood are often lost
in the oppositional fray.
In 2013 we commissioned Just Between Us: Australian writers tell the truth
about female friendship. The anthology presented friendships between women as
they really are, focusing on individual experiences that challenged the pervasive
myth of the ‘best friend forever’. In Mothers & Others we have turned our
attention to this other important realm of women’s lives, to strip away the
stereotypes and insidious ideologies that mask the truths of motherhood.
Mothers & Others explores the plurality of experiences around motherhood –
whether they be about non—traditional modes of mothering, economic and
political constraints, infertility or the death of a child, or women side-stepping
parenthood altogether, by circumstance or by choice.
To write against the grain on this issue is scary. Our contributors have forged
ahead and told their stories with warmth, wit and honesty. Given the enormity of
the topic, its fundamental position in our culture and our lives, these stories are
acts of courage. The women presented in this anthology are some of our nation’s
finest writers and thinkers, and we are honoured to be able to share their ideas
and experiences.
Maggie Scott, Miriam Sved, Christie Nieman,
Maya Linden and Natalie Kon-yu
Editors