Table Of ContentMirages
t h e u n e x p u r g at e d d i a r Y
o f a n a ï s n i n 1 9 3 9 – 1 9 4 7
edited and
with a preface by
paul herron
introduction by
KiM Krizan
anaÏ s nin
Advance praise for
Mirages: The Unexpurgated Diary of Anaïs Nin, 1939 – 1947
“Henry Miller called her a ‘masterpiece.’ Leaning on his elbows across the dinner ta-
ble one evening, he laughed as he told me, Anaïs was the greatest ‘fabulist’ he had ever
known and one ‘possessed of the nine lives of the cat.’ Nin herself referred to her lies as
‘mensonges vitals’ by which she meant the lies that give life. Her brother Joaquin Nin
likened Anaïs to a ‘steel hummingbird’ and Edmund Wilson said she was a ‘practical little
Franco-Spanish housewife’ who was, at the same time, ‘a lovely little nymph who was not
quite a human being.’
“As for myself, she was a myth in her own time, the Scheherazade of the diary genre,
and epitomizes Harold Bloom’s observation in Shakespeare: The Invention of the Human,
to wit, ‘Romance, literary and human, depends on partial or imperfect knowledge.’ I
leave it to readers of Mirages: The Unexpurgated Diary of Anaïs Nin, 1939–1947 to draw
their own conclusions.”
—Barbara Kraft, author of Anaïs Nin: The Last Days and
The Restless Spirit: Journal of a Gemini, with a preface by Anaïs Nin
“Mirages comprises . . . anything but. Instead, here, editor Paul Herron, like a spy in
the great house of love, offers up the utterly unexpurgated Nin, and we have Salome,
The Diarist, at last without her many veils. Till now, but for tantalizing glimpses,
Anaïs the woman—carnal, conflicted, endlessly seeking completion through flesh and
heart—has appeared only in heavily redacted snippets. In Mirages, she stands before
us, stripped bare, unmasked, triumphant, among her cast of sacred and noires bêtes
(Gore Vidal, Henry Miller, et al.) now revealed, by name, as who and what they were
to her. Mirages exposes, reveals and humanizes Nin as much more than the sum of
heavily edited parts.”
—Elizabeth Boleman-Herring, author of
The Visitors’ Book (or Silva Rerum): An Erotic Fable
“Mirages provides a treasure of newly disclosed Nin sentiments. Nin transcends self-
reflection and offers a glimpse into what women feel but are rarely able to articulate,
whether about daily experiences, or love gained and lost. With intense passion, her
powerfully seductive prose shares insights, observations, and confessions about the
human psyche. Highly recommended.”
—Diana Raab, author of Dear Anaïs: My Life in Poems for You
M
i r a g e s
S P B a n
wallow reSS ookS By naïS in
FIcTIoN
Children of the Albatross
Cities of the Interior
Collages
The Four-Chambered Heart
House of Incest
Ladders to Fire
Seduction of the Minotaur
A Spy in the House of Love
Under a Glass Bell
Waste of Timelessness and Other Early Stories
Winter of Artifice
NoNFIcTIoN
D. H. Lawrence: An Unprofessional Study
The Novel of the Future
A Woman Speaks: The Lectures, Seminars, and Interviews of Anaïs Nin,
edited by Evelyn J. Hinz
S P B a n
wallow reSS ookS aBout naïS in
Arrows of Longing: The Correspondence between Anaïs Nin and
Felix Pollak, 1952–1976, edited by Gregory H. Mason
Recollections of Anaïs Nin by Her Contemporaries,
edited by Benjamin Franklin V
M
I R A G E S
The Unexpurgated Diary
of Anaïs Nin
1939–1947
•
Edited by Paul Herron
With an introduction by Kim Krizan
S P / o u P
wallow reSS hio niverSity reSS
Athens, ohio
Published in association with sky blue Press
Swallow Press
An imprint of ohio University Press, Athens, ohio 45701
www.ohioswallow.com
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. This book contains material protected under International and Federal copyright Laws
and Treaties. Any unauthorized reprint or use of this material is prohibited. No part of this book may be reproduced
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Digital trade edition published by Sky Blue Press, San Antonio, Texas, USA. Inquiries about worldwide electronic
sales from all digital trade vendors should be directed to Sky Blue Press (skybluepress.com).
Print edition and institutional digital edition published by Swallow Press/ohio University Press, Athens, ohio
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This book may not be circulated in any other binding or cover.
1st Edition. Unexpurgated.
All content unless otherwise stated, copyright © 2013 The Anaïs Nin Trust (anaisnintrust.com)
This edition published by arrangement with Sky Blue Press.
Introduction copyright © 2013 Kim Krizan
Preface copyright © 2013 Paul Herron
Excerpts from The Diary of Anaïs Nin, Volume Three, 1939–1944 (copyright © 1969 by Anaïs Nin and renewed by
Rupert Pole and Gunther Stuhlmann) and The Diary of Anaïs Nin, Volume Four, 1944–1947 (copyright © 1971 by
Anaïs Nin and renewed by Rupert Pole and Gunther Stuhlmann) reprinted by permission of Houghton Mifflin
Harcourt Publishing company. All rights reserved.
Typesetting and design: Sara A. Herron, Sky Blue Press
Cover photo: courtesy of The Anaïs Nin Trust; Deigh-Nevin
Cover design: ohio University Press/Swallow Press
All photographs copyright © The Anaïs Nin Trust, with the following exceptions:
Edward Graeffe: James Abresch, photographer
Valentina orlikova: Soviet Russia Today (April 1943)
Anaïs Nin in Provincetown: José Alemany, photographer
Anaïs Nin in action coat: Soichi Sunami, photographer
Printed in the United States of America
Swallow Press/ohio University Press books are printed on acid-free paper ƒ ™
23 22 21 20 19 18 17 16 15 14 13 5 4 3 2 1
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Nin, Anaïs, 1903–1977.
Mirages : the Unexpurgated Diary of Anaïs Nin 1939–1947 / [Anaïs Nin] ; preface by Paul Herron ; introduction by
Kim Krizan ; edited by Paul Herron.
pages cm
Includes index.
ISBN 978-0-8040-1146-4 (hc : alk. paper) — ISBN 978-0-8040-4057-0 (electronic)
1. Nin, Anaïs, 1903–1977. 2. Authors, American—20th century—Biography. I. Herron, Paul, editor. II. Title.
PS3527.I865Z46 2013
818’.5209—dc23
[B]
2013026626
To Gunther and Barbara Stuhlmann
a
cknowledgmentS
The editor gratefully acknowledges The Anaïs Nin Trust, Sara Herron, John Ferrone,
and Kim Krizan for their guidance and dedication to this book.
Anaïs Nin at Provincetown
T A B L E O F C O N T E N T S
Preface by Paul Herron ...........................................................................................ix
introduction by Kim Krizan................................................................................xi
again towardS america - Will I ever reach joy? ...........................................1
John - I believe I have defended myself against suffering .......................................14
nanankePichu II - We saved the dream ............................................................31
the collector - I suggested we feed him the diary ..........................................41
intermezzo - Please lead me into the world of pleasure .....................................58
i rememBered thiS - My first erotic feeling ......................................................86
the PreSS - I don’t want to think—I want to do some typesetting ......................98
no Puedo maS - I do not want you back .........................................................104
a dream of haiti - My desire surges towards him ........................................150
woman of action - I feel ready for this .........................................................185
under a glaSS Bell - My own soul has reached into other souls ................215
l’homme fatal - My difficulty with the feminine man ....................................236
the tranSParent child - He is my son, my lover ......................................250
the ProBlem of the diary - My own voice is here ...................................281
thiS great hunger - Now you must find reality ..........................................292
gore - If I could have loved a woman, it would be you .......................................309
awakening - Oh, the drug of my marvelous dreams .........................................349
endingS - The hell grew larger as the illusions broke ..........................................376
renunciation - There was a stranger in my bed ..............................................386
life! - Touch, oh, touch this man of fire ................................................................398
index .........................................................................................................................407
