Table Of Content14th edition
Living
Together
A Legal Guide for
Unmarried Couples
By Attorneys Toni Ihara, Ralph Warner & Frederick Hertz
e
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14th edition
Living
Together
A Legal Guide for
Unmarried Couples
By Attorneys Toni Ihara, Ralph Warner & Frederick Hertz
fourteenth edition february 2008
editor emily doskow
Cover design susan putney
production margaret livingston
proofreader paul tyler
Cd-rom preparation ellen bitter
index songbird indexing
printing Consolidated printers, inC.
ihara, toni lynne.
living together : a legal guide for unmarried couples / by toni ihara, ralph
warner & frederick hertz. -- 14th ed.
p. cm.
Includes index.
ISBN-13: 978-1-4133-0755-9 (pbk.)
ISBN-10: 1-4133-0755-8 (pbk.)
1. Unmarried couples--Legal status, laws, etc.--United States. 2. Unmarried
couples--Legal status, laws, etc.--United States--Forms. I. Warner, Ralph E. II.
Hertz, Frederick. III. Title.
KF538.I35 2008
346.7301'6--dc22
2007035643
Copyright © 1978, 1979, 1984, 1988, 1990, 1994, 1997, 1999, 2000, 2001, 2004, 2006, and 2008
by toni ihara and ralph warner.
all rights reserved. printed in the u.s.a.
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Acknowledgments
recent editions of Living Together have beneftted from the extraordinary legal research
help of ella hirst and alayna schroeder and the exceptional editing and creative input of
marcia stewart and kathleen michon. Tanks, too, to amy ihara for her hard work and
creative contributions during the manuscript preparation stage.
for the 12th and subsequent editions, thanks are due to twila slesnick for her edits and
additions to the income tax and retirement plans material.
About the Author
attorneys toni ihara and ralph warner have been involved in the self-help law movement
since its inception in the early 1970s. ralph warner is a co-founder of nolo and is author
of several self-help legal books, including Everybody’s Guide to Small Claims Court. toni
ihara is an anthropologist turned lawyer turned graphic artist, and has been with nolo
since the beginning. after living together for nearly 20 years, toni and ralph are now
married.
frederick hertz is a practicing attorney and mediator and the author of Legal Afairs:
Essential Advice for Same-Sex Couples (owl books) and co-author of nolo’s A Legal Guide
for Lesbian & Gay Couples. he lives in the san francisco bay area.
Table of Contents
Living Together: An Introduction
1
Te Legal State of Living Together
2
Sex and the Law ...........................................................................................................................6
Domestic Partners......................................................................................................................7
Common Law Marriage ..........................................................................................................8
Living Together Contracts .................................................................................................. 10
To Be Safe, Write It Down ................................................................................................... 14
What Happens to Your Written Living Together Agreement
If You Get Married?............................................................................................................ 16
Special Issues for Seniors ..................................................................................................... 18
Living Together Agreements: Why and How
3
Ten Tips for Writing a Living Together Agreement ............................................... 21
Property Agreements ........................................................................................................... 23
Agreement to Share Ownership of a Joint Purchase ............................................ 30
Agreement Covering Joint Projects ............................................................................... 35
Agreement Covering Homemaker Services .............................................................. 37
Agreement for Artists and Inventors ............................................................................ 39
Agreement for People in School ..................................................................................... 42
Agreement to Protect Person Who Moves a Long Distance
or Gives Up a Job ................................................................................................................. 42
Debt, Credit, Taxes, and More: Practical Aspects of
4
Living Together
Debt and Credit ........................................................................................................................ 47
Buying and Investing Together ......................................................................................... 50
Discrimination........................................................................................................................... 51
Sharing Your Last Name ...................................................................................................... 54
Income Taxes ............................................................................................................................. 55
Social Security ........................................................................................................................... 57
Retirement Plans ...................................................................................................................... 59
Public Benefts ........................................................................................................................... 60
Insurance ...................................................................................................................................... 61
Liability for Medical Care of a Mate .............................................................................. 63
Making Medical and Financial Decisions for Your Partner .............................. 63
Wrongful Death and Loss of Consortium Lawsuits .............................................. 66
Renting and Sharing a Home
5
Discrimination on the Basis of Marital Status ......................................................... 68
Leases and Rental Agreements ........................................................................................ 69
Moving In Together ................................................................................................................ 70
Dealing With Objections When Moving Into the
Rental Home of One Partner........................................................................................ 73
Getting Your Security Deposit Back.............................................................................. 77
Buying a House Together
6
May Sellers Discriminate Against Unmarried Buyers? ........................................ 81
How to Find and Work With a Real Estate Agent ................................................. 82
Househunting Online ........................................................................................................... 83
Home Financing and Mortgages ..................................................................................... 84
Proceeding With Your Purchase: Ofers, Inspections,
Escrow, and Closing ........................................................................................................... 89
Taking Title to Your New Home ...................................................................................... 90
Contracts for Couples Owning a Home Together ................................................ 94
Contract for Equal Ownership of a House ............................................................... 95
Contract for Unequal Ownership of a House ........................................................103
Agreement for One Person to Move Into the Other’s House
and Become an Immediate Co-Owner .................................................................106
Agreement for One Person to Move Into the Other’s House
and Become a Co-Owner Gradually ......................................................................110
Starting a Family
7
Having a Child: Legal Obligations of Unmarried Parents ................................116
Naming the Baby and Getting a Birth Certifcate................................................116
Naming the Father: Paternity .........................................................................................117
Legitimacy of Children Born to Unmarried Parents ...........................................120
Adopting a Child ...................................................................................................................122
Public and Private Benefts for a Child of Unmarried Parents ......................125
Inheritance Rights of a Child of Unmarried Parents ..........................................125
