I Can Read You Like a Book: How to Spot the Messages and Emotions People Are Really Sending With Their Body Language

288 Pages·2007·1.7 MB·English

by  Gregory Hartley

Chapter Title Here Please 1
I C A N R E A D
Y O U L I K E
A B O O K
how to spot the
messages and emotions
people are really sending
with their body language
Gregory Hartley and Maryann Karinch
authors of How to Spot a Liar
Franklin Lakes, NJ
2 I Can Read You Like a Book
Copyright © 2007 by Gregory Hartley and Maryann Karinch
All rights reserved under the Pan-American and International Copy-
right Conventions. This book may not be reproduced, in whole or in
part, in any form or by any means electronic or mechanical, including
photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval
system now known or hereafter invented, without written permission
from the publisher, The Career Press.
I CAN READ YOU LIKEA BOOK
EDITEDAND TYPESETBY GINA TALUCCI
Printed in the U.S.A. by Book-mart Press
To order this title, please call toll-free 1-800-CAREER-1 (NJ and
Canada: 201-848-0310) to order using VISA or MasterCard, or for
further information on books from Career Press.
The Career Press, Inc., 3 Tice Road, PO Box 687,
Franklin Lakes, NJ 07417
www.careerpress.com
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Hartley, Gregory.
I can read you like a book : how to spot the messages and emotions
people are really sending with their body language / by Gregory
Hartley and Maryann Karinch.
p. cm.
Includes Index.
ISBN-13: 978-156414-941-1
ISBN-10: 1-56414-941-2
1. Body language. 2. Interpersonal communication. 3. Nonverbal
communication. I. Karinch, Maryann. II. Title.
BF637.N66H38 2007
153.6’9--dc22
2006038158
Chapter Title Here Please 3
D
E
To my mom and dad, and Betty and Marlin Hartley,
D
for sacrificing so that I could do and become things they
could never imagine.
I
—Greg
C
To Jim, Mom, and Karl, for your unwavering support
A
and energetic love.
T
—Maryann
I
O
N
This page intentionally left blank
Chapter Title Here Please 5
A
C
K
N
O
W
Thank you to Jim McCormick for giving me loving sup-
port, despite my ridiculous schedule, and for providing keen L
insights along the way. As always, I want to thank my mother
and brother, Karl, for being ready with encouraging words. E
I am also grateful for the enthusiasm and support we have
received from the Career Press team, specifically, Ron Fry, D
Michael Pye, Kristen Parkes, Laurie Kelly-Pye, Gina Talucci
andLinda Rienecker. Also, my dear friends whose good
G
thinking and professions enable them to offer me practical
guidance, especially Patti Mengers and David Kozinski.
M
Thank you, too, Scott and Eliza Ferzeley, for allowing us to
use a picture of your smiling son, Caden, in the book. And
E
to our talented model, Kurtis Kelly. I also want to acknowl-
edge the experts whose research and writings helped
N
provide deeper understanding of some of the key issues
T
S
6 I Can Read You Like a Book
covered in the book, particularly Candace Gordonand Dr. Louann
Brizendine. And thank you, Greg, for being such a fun and
enlightening partner!
—Maryann Karinch
First and foremost, thanks to the volunteers who defend our coun-
try in time of war for too little pay and uncertain futures. May we
tread carefully when criticizing national policy lest we injure one of
these heroes.
This book would not exist if not for Michael Dobson, who
encouraged me to share my thoughts with you and introduced me
to Maryann. This book could not happen without all the support
Dina gives me. Jeffrey has changed the way I see the world and
myself and for that I am grateful. Rick Croley expands my mind by
challenging me to think in new ways about old topics through wonder-
ful conversation. Thank you to Jim McCormick for insight, cama-
raderie, and support. Maryann, this book has been a pleasure to
create thanks to you.
—Greg Hartley
Contents 7
Introduction: Why You Need This Book 9
C
Part I: Body Language Basics
Chapter 1: The Steps to Reading Body Language 17
O
Chapter 2: Culture: The Big External Influence 37
N
Part II: Learn to R.E.A.D. (Review Evaluate
Analyze Decide)
T
Chapter 3: Review From Scalp to Soles:
E
R in R.E.A.D. 65
Chapter 4: Gesturing, With or Without Intent 115 N
Chapter 5: The Holistic View:
T
E in R.E.A.D. 127
S
Chapter 6: Filters: Sex and Other Misconceptions 163
Chapter 7: Making It Personal:
A in R.E.A.D. 187
8 I Can Read You Like a Book
Part III: Applying the Skill
Chapter 8: Politicians, Pundits, and Stars:
D in R.E.A.D. 209
Chapter 9: The Man in the Street 231
Chapter 10: Using Body Language to Your
Advantage in Business 247
Chapter 11: Using Body Language in
Your Personal Life 261
Part IV: Conclusion
Chapter 12: Using R.E.A.D. 273
Glossary 277
Index 279
About the Authors 285
Introduction 9
Why You Need
This Book
I
N
T
R
Do you want to: O
ƒ Know the early warning signs of rage?
D
ƒ Elect people who really know what they’re
talking about?
U
ƒ Establish rapport quickly with customers?
ƒ Contribute juicy insights to discussions about C
your favorite celebrities?
T
ƒ Recognize love at first sight?
ƒ Become the salesperson everyone wants to
I
talk to?
ƒ Be the actor who nails every scene, and O
always gets the call back?
N
9