Hollywood, Interrupted: Insanity Chic in Babylon -- The Case Against Celebrity

416 Pages·2004·1.6 MB·English

by  Andrew Breitbart

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HOLLYWOOD,
INTERRUPTED
Insanity Chic in Babylon—
The Case Against Celebrity
Andrew Breitbart
and Mark Ebner
JOHN WILEY & SONS, INC.
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MORE PRAISE FOR HOLLYWOOD, INTERRUPTED
“Fearless. Vicious. Hilarious. Andrew Breitbart and Mark Ebner prove
conclusively that radical family values +infinite financial resources +
cultural idol worship = moral chaos.
Celebrity is the modern American version of aristocracy. Hollywood,
Interruptedshows that our celebrities are every bit as mad, corrupt, and
unaccountable as their Medieval European counterparts (albeit with
better teeth). And like the old aristocracy, they really are one big, in-
cestuous family.
What you don’t understand—what you could not possibly under-
stand—is that not only are these people nuts: They’re nuts who all know
each other. Hollywood is the most dysfunctional family in the history
of the world and Hollywood, Interrupted reads like a transcript of their
therapy session. It’s cheeky, sophisticated, and authoritative.”
Jonathan Last, Weekly Standard
“Hollywood hypocrites are going to simmer with fury at the painful
barbs, backed up by plenty of facts, that these two sleuthing authors
toss at some of the industry’s most beloved stars and wags. If you love
Larry King and Oprah, you’d better get ready to defend their honor,
because this book deftly melts the shine off their armor.”
Jill Stewart, “Capitol Punishment” syndicated columnist,
radio and television political commentator
“‘The rich are not like you and me,’ F. Scott Fitzgerald said. Hollywood,
Interrupted demonstrates that the rich and famous are not like any-
body—at least anybody you’d want to be, or even shake hands with. In
the deliriously scandalous tradition of Hollywood Babylon, Breitbart
and Ebner’s juicy dispatch from the spiritual capital of the Porn Belt
reveals Tinseltown to be a glorified cathouse populated by collagened
sociopaths. These also happen to be the people who drive American
popular culture. Be afraid, be very afraid.”
Rod Dreher, Dallas Morning News
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“In Hollywood, Interrupted Breitbart and Ebner dig deeply into the
very heart of our greatest export—pop culture—as produced by
Hollywood, the movie industry and the people who affect and infect
America. You cannot take a more fascinating or terrifying trip. There
are tales of the fabulously famous here you would never know if not
for their work. Hollywood, Interrupted is a book you have to put down
frequently in order to catch your breath. Absolutely riveting.”
Lucianne Goldberg, Publisher, Lucianne.com
News Forum and Talk Radio Network host
“This book blew me away. It’s more than I wanted to know, but I
couldn’t stop reading it.”
Orson Bean, actor
“Reading Hollywood, Interrupted is like sitting on a stakeout and hav-
ing a telescopic view into the darkest reaches of the corruption and
perversity of today’s celebrity culture.
From the very first page to the last, Breitbart and Ebner’s probing
reporting spells out in graphic detail how Hollywood lives by a set of
norms the rest of America finds appropriately appalling—and end-
lessly fascinating. The authors have the unusual courage to take on
Scientology. They provide revelations about Michael Jackson’s sick-
ness that go beyond even today’s headlines. They rip the phony veneer
off the political correctness of Rosie O’Donnell and Barbra Streisand.
They give readers a behind-the-scenes understanding of how snoop-
ing private eyes and ruthless information brokers feed scoops to the
tabloids. And, in one riveting chapter, they document how a young
woman in the AOL backroom unmasked the bizarre fetishes of some
ofTinseltown’s top names. Hollywood, Interruptedis no ‘E’ channel fluff.
It’s disturbing stuff. But it’s all too real and it’s utterly riveting.”
Richard Gooding, investigative reporter
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HOLLYWOOD,
INTERRUPTED
Insanity Chic in Babylon—
The Case Against Celebrity
Andrew Breitbart
and Mark Ebner
JOHN WILEY & SONS, INC.
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Copyright © 2004 by Andrew Breitbart and Mark Ebner. All rights reserved.
Published by John Wiley & Sons, Inc., Hoboken, New Jersey.
Published simultaneously in Canada.
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ISBN 0-471-45051-0
Printed in the United States of America
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Dedicated to
Benjamin Geza Affleck
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CONTENTS
Acknowledgments xi
Introduction xiii
PART I: IT’S A FAMILY AFFAIR
1 Hollywood Family Values: A New Weird Order 3
Hollywood families exposed for not only not upholding family
values but pissing all over middle-class mores. Rethinking
the life and death of River Phoenix. Familial implosions
exposed. It’s gotten so bad we argue for sterilization of the
celebrity class.
2 In Loco Parentis: Hollywood Nannies 31
Hollywood nannies speak out and tell all—“There is no laughter
in this house.” Nannies so stressed they’ve formed a Beverly
Hills support group. A nanny gets blacklisted.
3 Hollyweird High 43
Inside Crossroads School for the Arts & Sciences, where
Hollywood elite send their children, and we find, like any other
school in the Western world, sex, drugs, and rock-n-roll.
Unlike other high schools, we also discover Crossdressing Day,
Ménage à Prom, death, and a mandatory pseudo-therapeutic
program called “Mysteries.”
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viii CONTENTS
PART II: FEAR AND LOATHING IN LOS ANGELES
4 Screwball Tragedy 65
Hollywood’s strange history with insanity, drugs,
and therapy.
5 Doctor Feelgoods 79
Not feeling so hot? Call the doctor. Top Gunproducer over-
doses. Winona’s Dr. Feelgood loses his license. Oliver Stone
signs a medic. Lily-livered Hollywood “heppers,” including
Stripperella, try anything.
6 From Rehab to Retox 97
Rehab centers to the stars get visits from Matthew Perry,
Robert Downey Jr., Ben Affleck, among others. Celeb rehab
spas offer a panoply of treatment programs from equine therapy
to brain wave analysis. Not on the menu—sex in the bathroom.
PART III: THE BELIEVERS
7 Karma Chameleons 107
Madonna and friends converge on Kabbalah. Hollywood cults
run amok. Established religion is evil.
8 Shilling for Scientology:
I Want Your Body—Thetans 125
Scientology rocks!
PART IV: CALIFORNICATION
9 Sex in This City 141
The pornification of America. There’s a whorehouse in Beverly
Hills. Swing Kids club hop. Hugh Hefner is a porn baron. The
Heidi Tapes.