Table Of ContentWith Scarlett.
Dedicated to the memory of my grandfather
Teodoro Millan Angulo
and
to my father, Felipe Millan Guillen;
I thank them both for teaching me how to truly appreciate, respect, and love
Mother Nature
Special thanks to my mother, Maria Teresa Favela d’Millan, who taught me the
power of a dream
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
This first book means so much to me, and it’s important that I give credit to all
of the people who have in some way influenced my life—who helped get me to
the point where I’m actually fulfilling my dream of writing a book! Some of
these people I’ve never met, but all have helped to shape the way I think and the
way I approach my work.
First among those is Jada Pinkett Smith, who has been more than just a client;
she has also been a mentor, a guide, and a role model. Thank you, Jada, for your
beautiful spirit, and for showing me the meaning of unconditional friendship.
I want to credit Jay Real for taking me under his wing and teaching me the rules,
boundaries, and limitations in the business world. Jay, you are a man of honor.
You instinctively knew when to take me by the hand and to lead, but you also
knew when it was time for me to leave the nest and fly away. I will always be
grateful for that.
There are also two women I need to thank, the women who ran a grooming
parlor in San Diego and who hired me when I first came to the United States.
Forgive me for not recalling your names—I knew no English then, and
American names were very difficult for me. But if you are reading this, please
know that I’ll never forget what you did for me. I think of you as my first (but
not my last!) American guardian angels.
“Self-help” authors and experts are often trivialized in the media, but I credit
several of them with the success I have today. Oprah Winfrey influenced me
long before I had the honor of meeting her in person and working with her dogs.
Her show “How to Say No” changed my life early in my career, because at that
time I was saying no to my family, but yes to everyone else.
Thank you, Oprah, for your wisdom and insight. To me you will always be the
embodiment of “calm-assertive” energy in the way you approach your life and
your work. You are truly a stellar “pack leader” for the human race!
There are others I want to mention and recommend who have influenced both
my life and the way I work with dogs. Anthony Robbins showed me how to set a
goal, stick to the tasks required to realize that goal, and reach it. Dr. Wayne Dyer
taught me the power of intention. Deepak Chopra helped me clarify my beliefs
regarding the balance between body and soul, and our connections with the
natural and spiritual worlds. Dr. Phil McGraw taught me how to give people
information they may not want to hear in a loving way, and he also helped me
gracefully accept the fact that my advice isn’t for everyone. The book Men Are
from Mars, Women Are from Venus, by psychologist John Gray, helped save my
marriage.
There was a point in my life when I was desperate to know if I was crazy, when I
wondered if I was the only person in the world who believed that dog
psychology—not dog training—was the key to helping dogs with problems. The
late Dr. Leon F. Whitney’s Dog Psychology: The Basics of Dog Training and Dr.
Bruce Fogle’s The Dog’s Mind were the two books that saved my sanity and
helped me to see that I was on the right track.
When the Los Angeles Times published a feature article on me back in 2002, a
flock of Hollywood producers descended on my Dog Psychology Center all at
once, each one promising me the moon in exchange for signing away my life
and my “rights.” Sheila Emery and Kay Sumner were the only two who didn’t
want to take something from me, and who didn’t make wild promises. I thank
them for introducing me to the MPH Entertainment group—Jim Milio, Melissa
Jo Peltier, and Mark Hufnail. The MPH/Emery-Sumner team sold my show, Dog
Whisperer with Cesar Millan, to the National Geographic Channel. Unlike other
producers who had approached me, the MPH partners didn’t want to change me.
They never once asked me to pretend to be something I was not. They wanted to
present me exactly as I was—no frills, no showmanship, just my essence. Kay,
Sheila, and the three MPH partners—I call them my “television pack”—have
helped keep me grounded and balanced in a business that can easily cause
newcomers to lose their equilibrium.
I especially want to acknowledge my two special kids, Andre and Calvin. They
have a father who is extremely dedicated to his mission, a mission that has often
taken up time that could have been spent with them. I want them to know as they
grow that every second that I’m not with them, they are foremost in my
thoughts. My amazing boys, you are my reason to keep going; any imprint on
the world I make I make for you. I want you to grow up in a family of honor that
stands for something important. Andre and Calvin, I hope you will always
remember and cherish your roots.
Most important of all, there is my strength, my backbone—my wife, Ilusion
Wilson Millan. I believe that no man is luckier than one who has a woman
behind him 100 percent, and I am blessed to have that. Ilusion was there with me
before I was “somebody” or had anything. She showed me the importance of
unconditional love, and at the same time, she really “rehabilitated” me. I was
born grounded, but before I married my wife, I was starting to get lost. I became
selfish and had my priorities mixed up. Ilusion brought me back. She gave me
rules, boundaries, and limitations. She always fought for what she believed was
best for the relationship, and what was best for our family, and she never backed
down from that. She loves human beings the way I love dogs. Earlier in my
career, it was easier for me to dismiss the human part of the human-dog
relationship, but Ilusion saw right away that it was the humans who had to “get
it” in order for the dogs to be happy. She’s also the most unselfish and forgiving
person I have ever met. She knows what true forgiveness is—not just the words,
but the action of forgiving; for her this has meant forgiving those responsible for
some very traumatic things that happened in her life. That in itself is an
inspiration for me. Ilusion, every day I wake up proud and honored to have you
as my wife.
Finally, there are the dogs. If I were a tree, all the wonderful people in my life
would be the ones who influenced my growth, but dogs would still be my roots.
They keep me grounded. In every dog I see, there lives the spirit of my
grandfather, the man who most influenced my life’s purpose, who first
introduced me to the miracle of animals and the wonders of Mother Nature.
Dogs don’t read books, so this acknowledgment means nothing to them. But I
hope, when I’m near them, that they always sense the energy of my undying
gratitude for all they have given me.
Melissa Jo Peltier wishes to thank:
Laureen Ong, John Ford, Colette Beaudry, Mike Beller, and Michael Cascio at
the National Geographic Channel, as well as Russel Howard and Chris Albert,
their crack publicity department; our crew and staff on Dog Whisperer with
Cesar Millan, for their consistent excellence; Scott Miller at Trident Media
Group, for his faith and patience, and the incomparable Ronald Kessler, for
introducing me to Trident; Kim Meisner and Julia Pastore of Harmony Books,
for their expertise; Heather Mitchell, for her research and fact-checking; Kay
Sumner and Sheila Emery, for bringing Cesar into our lives; Ilusion Millan, for
her trust and friendship; Jim Milio and Mark Hufnail, for ten amazing years and
counting; Euclid J. Peltier (Dad), for inspiration; the lovely Caitlin Gray, for
being patient with me during a summer of writing; and John Gray, the love of
my life—you’ve changed everything.
And of course, Cesar. Thank you, Cesar, for the honor of allowing me to be part
of your purpose.
FOREWORD BY JADA PINKETT SMITH
Let me prepare you for the idea that you will learn just as much about yourself
through Cesar Millan’s dog psychology as you will about your dog(s). You see,
we humans are the ones who have lost the concept of the natural order in which
our dogs function. Our lack of knowledge about the nature of our pets and their
needs strips our animals of the natural instincts they use to survive. This creates
an imbalanced, unhappy pet that is more of a headache than a joy. Cesar helps us
understand the natural ways our dogs live, so they become more balanced and
happier.
Our dogs, in this state, enable us to develop a healthier companionship with
them.
Through his patience and wisdom, Cesar has been a blessing to my family, my
dogs, and me.
So, new students, be open to learning new things, and be blessed.
FOREWORD BY MARTIN DEELEY
President, International Association of Canine Professionals Today, even though
we have more books, more help, more training gadgets, and definitely more
treats, there are more badly behaved dogs than ever before. We have the means
to help us achieve well-behaved dogs, yet we lack sufficient understanding of
our dogs’ natures. While most of us are well-intentioned and loving dog owners,
this lack of understanding can create many common dog problems. Put simply,
dogs are not small humans. They do not think like humans, act like humans, or
see the world in the same way as humans. Dogs are dogs, and we need to respect
them as dogs. We do them a huge disservice by treating them like humans and
thus create many of the bad behaviors we see today.
From the first moment I saw Cesar Millan work with dogs on his show Dog
Whisperer, I knew he understood this concept. He is a unique man who is not
afraid to be politically incorrect, who talks about leadership with dogs and is not
afraid to give and show a correction when a dog requires it. I am continually
impressed with the way Cesar interacts with both dogs and their owners. Cesar
explains what is creating the problem in a way that every dog owner can
understand. His personality, warmth, and humor are irresistible; in the presence
of his charm, even the most stubborn owners listen and want to change. Not only
can he explain the situation, he can also fix the problem. With a minimal amount
of verbal communication, the dog complies, changing its attitude and its
behavior. Dogs respond to Cesar’s calm, confident approach. This is truly a man
who knows how to “speak dog.”
In this book, Cesar reminds us that the most important part of training a dog is
building a healthy relationship between human and dog, one in which the
boundaries between the two are clearly drawn. I know this to be critical from
personal experience. My first dog, Kim, never showed aggression and never
behaved improperly in public or when company visited my home.
Today, people would say, “What a well-trained dog.” But it wasn’t training; it
was because we shared a relationship based on the three key elements Cesar
details in this book: exercise, discipline, and affection.
Cesar shows us how to build this kind of relationship and helps us understand
our dogs in a better way. He also explains how dogs can change their behaviors
and attitudes with the right approach. This is essential information for everyone
who wants to live more peacefully with our valued companions.
