Bi: Bisexual, Pansexual, Fluid, and Nonbinary Youth

324 Pages·2021·2.158 MB·English

by  Ritch C. Savin-Williams

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Bisexual, Pansexual, Fluid, and Nonbinary Youth
Ritch C. Savin- Williams
NEW YORK UNIVERSITY PRESS New York
NEW YORK UNIVERSITY PRESS
New York
www.nyupress.org
© 2021 by New York University
All rights reserved
References to Internet websites (URLs) were accurate at the time of writing. Neither the au-
thor nor New York University Press is responsible for URLs that may have expired or changed
since the manuscript was prepared.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Names: Savin-Williams, Ritch C., author.
Title: Bi : bisexual, pansexual, fluid, and nonbinary youth / Ritch C. Savin-Williams.
Description: New York : New York University Press, [2021] |
Includes bibliographical references and index.
Identifiers: LCCN 2021011915 | ISBN 9781479811434 (hardback ; alk. paper) |
ISBN 9781479811465 (ebook) | ISBN 9781479811472 (ebook other)
Subjects: LCSH: Bisexual youth. | Bisexuality. | Sexual minority youth.
Classification: LCC HQ74 .S28 2021 | DDC 306.76/50835—dc23
LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2021011915
New York University Press books are printed on acid- free paper, and their binding materials
are chosen for strength and durability. We strive to use environmentally responsible suppliers
and materials to the greatest extent possible in publishing our books.
Manufactured in the United States of America
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Also available as an ebook
To the love of my life, Kenneth Miles Cohen

Contents
Preface ix
Introduction 1
Part I: Understanding Bisexuality
1. Bisexuality Now 9
2. Men: Stories across the Bisexual Continuum 16
3. Women: Stories across the Bisexual Continuum 30
4. Generational Rebellion 42
5. Who Is Bisexual? 54
6. Straights Having Sex with Each Other 65
7. Why Romance Matters 77
8. How Many Bisexuals Are There? 92
Part II: The Sexual and Gender Spectrum
9. Pansexuality 113
10. Fluidity 131
11. Genderqueer and Nonbinary 152
12. Gender Variance and Gender Toxicity 162
Part III: Bisexuals Are Not All the Same
13. Race and Ethnicity Matter 179
14. Bi in the Country 208
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Part IV: Beyond a Singular Bisexuality
15. Bisexualities: What Needs to Change 225
16. Postidentity Revolution 244
Acknowledgments 261
Methodological Appendix 263
Notes 271
Index 305
About the Author 313
Preface
Nearly four decades ago, an influential psychiatrist suggested that
bisexuality does not exist. By denying individuals can have attractions
to more than one sex, he was not alone then or now. Just over a decade
ago, the most famous sex therapist in the United States, Dr. Ruth, con-
curred: Bisexuality is “an in- between stage,” and “there really is no such
thing as being bisexual.” Subsequent scientists, clinical practitioners,
educators, and the general public appeared to agree, creating in their
wake a dilemma for those who thought otherwise, those living lives that
were neither straight nor gay but something else. Were they merely in
transition to their ultimate gay or lesbian identity, or when they meet
the perfect woman or man, they will become straight? Other supposed
truisms also confused them: sexual orientation is an either/or category,
not a continuum with gradation marks; knowledge about deviant sexu-
ality can be gleaned from a small number of clinical patients; and, if one
identifies as bisexual, then they suffer from psychological and emotional
conflicts such as having a split personality, manifesting a self-d estructive
rage directed at the self, and displaying a crushing dependency on oth-
ers. In other words, they were either straight or gay, and thus there is no
need for a book on bisexuality— except in courses on clinical psychol-
ogy, sociology of deviance, and public health.1
These beliefs would now shock many Millennials and Zoomers (Gen
Zers) who are living a life inconsistent with these caricatures. The docu-
mented clinical and scientific “truths” do not resemble their lives, and as
a result, many bisexual, pansexual, fluid, and nonbinary activists chal-
lenge these very ideas. In their wake, they have created a bisexuality that
defies traditional views, disputes false notions, and reimagines sexuality,
with regard to both practice and identity. Broadly speaking, many young
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