Table Of ContentMercury Falls
Robert Kroese
AmazonEncore (2010)
Rating: ☆
★★★★
Tags: Science Fiction, Humorous, Contemporary, Fiction, Fantasy, Adventure
Science Fictionttt Humorousttt Contemporaryttt Fictionttt Fantasyttt
Adventurettt
While on assignment in Nevada, Christine Temetri isn't surprised when yet another prophesied Apocalypse fails to occur. After three years of reporting on End Times cults for a religious news magazine,
Christine is seriously questioning her career choice. But then she meets Mercury, a cult leader whose knowledge of the impending Apocalypse is decidedly more solid than most: he is an angel, sent from
heaven to prepare for the Second Coming but distracted by beer, ping pong, and other earthly delights. After Christine and Mercury inadvertently save Karl Grissom---a film-school dropout and the
newly appointed Antichrist---from assassination, she realizes the three of them are all that stand in the way of mankind's utter annihilation. They are a motley crew compared to the heavenly host bent on
earth's destruction, but Christine figures they'll just have to do. Full of memorable characters, Mercury Falls is an absurdly funny tale about unlikely heroes on a quest to save the world.
Mercury Falls
A NOVEL BY ROBERT KROESE
The characters and events portrayed in this book are fictitious. Any similarity to
real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.
This novel was originally published in a slightly different form from St. Culain
Press in 2009.
Text copyright © 2010 Robert Kroese
All rights reserved
No part of this book may be reproduced, or stored in a retrieval system, or
transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying,
recording, or otherwise, without express written permission of the publisher.
Published by AmazonEncore
P.O. Box 400818
Las Vegas, NV 89140
ISBN: 978-1-935597-15-5
For Julia, the angel looking
over my shoulder.
With thanks to Teri Ahlstrom, Joel Bezaire,
Neva Cheatwood, Jim deJonge, Jocelyn Pihlaja,
and John Sellers for their unwavering
support and invaluable assistance.
CONTENTS
PROLOGUE
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHAPTER NINE
CHAPTER TEN
CHAPTER ELEVEN
CHAPTER TWELVE
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
CHAPTER NINETEEN
CHAPTER TWENTY
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
CHAPTER THIRTY
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR
CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE
CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX
CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN
CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT
CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE
CHAPTER FORTY
CHAPTER FORTY-ONE
CHAPTER FORTY-TWO
CHAPTER FORTY-THREE
CHAPTER FORTY-FOUR
CHAPTER FORTY-FIVE
CHAPTER FORTY-SIX
CHAPTER FORTY-SEVEN
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
PROLOGUE
To Your Holiness, the High Council of the Seraphim,
Greetings from your humble servant, Ederatz,
Cherub First Class,
Order of the Mundane Observation Corps
The first thing you'll notice about this report is that it's written in English. I have
to apologize for that; after a few millennia on Earth I'm a little rusty in High
Seraphic. Also, while the language of the angels is incontrovertibly more
melodious than any earth-bound tongue, it lacks a number of words which are
central to the telling of a story of such epic grandeur, such as linoleum, ping-
pong, and dickweed.
I have abandoned the anapestic tetrameter form traditionally used for these
reports, as it is surprisingly difficult to adapt to English. I got as far as:
White balls bouncing in the house of the one
And the corners of linoleum are peeling in the sun
I think this couplet has a certain epic feel to it, but on the downside it took me
three weeks to write. In addition, I'm afraid this account has a bit more moral
ambiguity than is really suited for the traditional form. I know, I'm supposed to
clear up the gray areas and present things in black and white, but you'd be
amazed at how complicated things have gotten here recently. In fact, it's hard to
even know what bits to include in the story. Who's the main character? What's
the point of the story? Could it be adapted into a TV movie? Your guess is as
good as mine. Although it is true that HBO has expressed some interest.
Until now relations between Heaven and the Mundane Plane have been a one-
way street. To us it was all about following the all-important Schedule of
Plagues, Announcements, and Miracles. We made little adjustments here and
there to keep history moving in the right direction, but we never actually got
involved in what was going on. I'm sure you're familiar with the motto of the
Mundane Observation Corps: Eternally Objective. I always took this motto very
Description:Years of covering the antics of End Times cults for The Banner, a religious news magazine, have left Christine Temetri not only jaded but seriously questioning her career choice.That is, until she meets Mercury, an anti-establishment angel who’s frittering his time away whipping up batches of Rice
