Insult to Injury: Rethinking our Responses to Intimate Abuse

193 Pages·2003·0.7 MB·English

by  Linda G. Mills

(cid:2) Insult to Injury
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(cid:2) Insult to Injury
Rethinking Our Responses
to Intimate Abuse
LINDA G. MILLS
PRINCETON UNIVERSITY PRESS
PRINCETON AND OXFORD
(cid:2) Copyright © 2003 by Princeton University Press
Published by Princeton University Press, 41 William Street, Princeton,
New Jersey 08540
In the United Kingdom: Princeton University Press, 3 Market Place, Woodstock,
Oxfordshire OX20 1SY
All Rights Reserved
Permission for the poem on page vii has been granted as follows: “Try to Praise the
Mutilated World” from Without End: New and Selected Poemsby Adam Zagajewski,
translated by Clare Cavanagh. Copyright © 2002 by Adam Zagajewski. Translation
copyright © 2002 by Farrar, Straus and Giroux, LLC. Reprinted by permission of Far-
rar, Straus and Giroux, LLC.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Mills, Linda G.
Insult to injury : rethinking our responses to intimate abuse / Linda G. Mills.
p. cm.
Includes bibliographical references and index.
ISBN 0-691-09639-2 (cloth : alk. paper)
1. Family violence. 2. Conjugal violence. 3. Wife abuse. 4. Abusive men.
5. Abusive women. 6. Feminist theory. I. Title.
HV66260.M55 2003
362.82(cid:2)92—dc21 2003044476
British Library Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available
This book has been composed in Goudy
Printed on acid-free paper. ∞
www.pupress.princeton.edu
Printed in the United States of America
10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
For Peter
(cid:2)who taught me there was so much more to love
And for Ronnie
(cid:2)who insists we learn these lessons
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(cid:2) Try to Praise the Mutilated World
Try to praise the mutilated world.
Remember June’s long days,
and wild strawberries, drops of wine, the dew.
The nettles that methodically overgrow
the abandoned homesteads of exiles.
You must praise the mutilated world.
You watched the stylish yachts and ships;
one of them had a long trip ahead of it,
while salty oblivion awaited others.
You’ve seen the refugees going nowhere,
you’ve heard the executioners sing joyfully,
You should praise the mutilated world.
Remember the moments when we were together
in a white room and the curtain fluttered.
Return in thought to the concert where music flared.
You gathered acorns in the park in autumn
and leaves eddied over the earth’s scars.
Praise the mutilated world
and the gray feather a thrush lost,
and the gentle light that strays and vanishes
and returns.
—Adam Zagajewski
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Contents
xi Giving Thanks
1 Prologue
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PARTI
Rethinking Our Responses
to Intimate Abuse
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19 One
The Ground Zero of Intimate Abuse
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33 Two
Mandatory Policies as Crime Reduction Strate-
gies: Do They Work?
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50 Three
Power over Women in Abusive Relationships
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67 Four
Are Women as Aggressive as Men?