Table Of ContentExploring
Bul
ly-
ing
with Adults with Autism and
Asperger Syndrome
A Photocopiable Workbook
of related interest
Asperger Syndrome and Bullying
Strategies and Solutions
Nick Dubin
Foreword by Michael John Carley
ISBN 978 1 84310 846 7
Being Bullied
Strategies and Solutions for People with Asperger’s Syndrome
DVD
Nick Dubin
ISBN 978 1 84310 843 6
Bully Blocking
Six Secrets to Help Children Deal with Teasing and Bullying – Revised Edition
Evelyn M. Field
ISBN 978 1 84310 554 1
Foundation Role Plays for Autism
Role Plays for Working with Individuals with Autism Spectrum Disorders, Parents, Peers, Teachers, and
Other Professionals
Andrew Nelson
Foreword by Pamela Wolfberg
ISBN 978 1 84905 063 0
Exploring
Bul
ly-
ing
with Adults with Autism
and Asperger Syndrome
A Photocopiable Workbook
Anna Tickle and Bettina Stott
Jessica Kingsley Publishers
London and Philadelphia
First published in 2010
by Jessica Kingsley Publishers
116 Pentonville Road
London N1 9JB, UK
and
400 Market Street, Suite 400
Philadelphia, PA 19106, USA
www.jkp.com
Copyright © Anna Tickle and Bettina Stott 2010
All pages may be photocopiable for personal use with this programme, but may not be reproduced for
any other purposes without the permission of the publisher.
Warning: The doing of an unauthorised act in relation to a copyright work may result in both a civil
claim for damages and criminal prosecution.
Library of Congress Cataloging in Publication Data
A CIP catalog record for this book is available from the Library of Congress
British Library Cataloguing in Publication Data
A CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library
ISBN 978 1 84905 035 7
ISBN pdf eBook 978 0 85700 397 3
Printed and bound in Great Britain by
MPG Books Group
We would like to dedicate this book
to the members of Aspire and to all of you
who continue to teach us so much.
The Stotts and H.G. Riese
The Tickles and Jon
Contents
A Note about Language and Content 11
Why this Book was Written 12
How to Use this Book 13
PART ONE: AN INTROduCTION TO BullyINg
1 your Experience of Bullying 16
2 What is Bullying? 19
Different types of bullying 19
Case Example: Mark 25
3 Where can Bullying Happen? 28
Which places can bullying happen in? 28
Which situations can bullying happen in? 29
Case Example: Mark (continued) 31
4 Who can be a Bully? 33
Case Example: Mark (continued) 35
5 Who Might be the Victim of a Bully? 38
Who might be bullied? 38
Things that may make you more vulnerable to bullying 38
Things that can help to protect you from bullying 39
Case Example: Ruth 40
A note on being different 42
6 Why Might People with Autism or Asperger Syndrome be at Risk of Bullying? 44
It’s not okay to bully somebody because they have ASD 44
People with ASD sometimes bully other people with ASD 44
Characteristics of ASD that bullies might pick on 44
Characteristics of ASD that you can be proud of 46
PART TWO: AN INTROduCTION TO FEElINgS, THOugHTS ANd
BEHAVIOuRS
7 Feelings 60
What are feelings? 60
Physical feelings 61
Emotional feelings 61
8 Thoughts 69
What are thoughts? 69
Are thoughts facts? 69
Thinking about things as ‘positive’ or ‘negative’ 70
Unhelpful thoughts and thinking patterns 70
9 Behaviours 76
What is behaviour? 76
Responsibility 76
Thinking about different types of behaviour 78
Finding new and helpful behaviours to replace unhelpful behaviours 81
10 Assertiveness: One Way of Behaving 86
What is Assertiveness? 86
Passive, assertive and aggressive behaviour 86
Case Example: Joy 88
Case Example: Joel 88
Case Example: Janine 88
What has assertiveness got to do with bullying? 91
Why might passive people be more vulnerable to bullying? 92
Why might aggressive people be more vulnerable to bullying others? 93
How can being assertive help to protect you from bullying and not bully others? 93
How to be more assertive 93
11 The Relationship Between Feelings, Thoughts and Behaviour 97
Tracing a thought in pictures: ‘I can’t cope’ 97
Changing feelings, thoughts and behaviour 101
PART THREE: FOR THOSE WHO ARE BEINg BullIEd
12 How Might I Feel when I am Being Bullied? 104
What physical feelings might I have if I am being bullied? 104
What emotional feelings might I have if I am being bullied? 108
Worksheet: What can I do if I have difficult feelings? 111
13 What Might I Think When I am Being Bullied? 116
What thoughts might I have if I am being bullied? 116
Worksheet: What can I do if I have difficult or upsetting thoughts? 117
Thoughts about hurting yourself or committing suicide 119
14 How Might I Behave if I am Being Bullied? 121
Unhelpful behaviours 121
Case Example: Sarah 122
Case Example: Howard 124
Case Example: Terri 126
Helpful behaviours to cope with bullying 128
15 Recognising when you are not Being Bullied 131
How can you tell when you are not being bullied but feel like you are? 131
An exercise to help tell the difference 135
16 Why is it Important to deal with Bullying? 141
The effects of being bullied 141
Why it is important to tell others about bullying 142
Your rights 143
Legal Protection 143
17 How can you deal with Bullying? 146
Dealing with all types of bullying 146
Is it worth dealing with bullying? 147
Practical ways to deal with bullying 147
18 My Plan to Stay Positive 163
19 When Things go Well 166
20 If Nothing Seems to Work… 168
The last resort 168
PART FOuR: FOR THOSE WHO ARE BullyINg OTHERS
21 Why Might People with Autism or Asperger Syndrome be at Risk of
Bullying Other People? 174
Characteristics of ASD that might make you more vulnerable to becoming a bully 174
22 How Might I Feel when I am Bullying Others? 196
What feelings might I have before I bully others? 196
What feelings might I have when I am bullying others? 206
What feelings might I have after bullying others? 213
Worksheet: What can I do with feelings that are upsetting or make me more likely to
bully? 221
General suggestions for coping with feelings 224
Using alcohol, drugs or medication to cope with difficult feelings 224
Self-harm 225
Feeling suicidal 225
23 What Might I Think when I am Bullying Others? 226
What thoughts might I have when bullying somebody else? 226
Worksheet: What can I do if I have difficult or upsetting thoughts? 228
24 How Might I behave when I am Bullying Others? 233
Physical bullying 233
Emotional bullying 234
Financial bullying 235
Sexual bullying 236
Cyberbullying 237
25 Why is it Important Not to Bully Others? 238
Why some people with ASD might be vulnerable to bullying others 238
The effects of bullying others 240
Why it is important to tell others about bullying 241
