Don't Put That in There!: And 69 Other Sex Myths Debunked

225 Pages·2014·0.92 MB·English

by  Aaron Carroll

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FOR
Aimee,
whose contributions to this book shall remain nameless, but appreciated
AND
Elizabeth and Becky,
because we can talk about anything, including sex
Contents
Title Page
Copyright Notice
Dedication
Introduction
Part I: Men
Penis Size Matters
Batters Up! The Battle of the 7-Inch Penis.
Big Feet, Big Hands, Big…?
Racial Penis Profiling
You Don’t Last Long Enough
You Shouldn’t Have Sex Before the Big Game
Foreskin and Seven Years Ago …
Your Balls Sag with Age
Wait for a Whopping Wad
Start Small, Stay Small
Don’t Swallow Your Cum!
There’s Always Semen When You’re Screamin’
You’re Going to Break That Boner
You Are Going to Pump That Geyser Dry
Part II: Women
Wearing a Bra Will Keep Your Boobs from Sagging
Women Don’t Really Want Sex
Bald Is Best (The Bush Versus the Brazilian)
G-men, G-spots—They Don’t Exist!
Women Do Not Squirt Like Men
Blonds Have More Fun
Nobody Has Pubic Hair These Days
Little Lost Tampon, Where Did It Go?
A Woman Needs Her Clitoris Stimulated to Have an Orgasm
Buy Our Product for That Clean, Fresh Feeling!
Bigger Breasts Are Less Sensitive
That Hole Does Nothing for Me
Part III: Sex
Oysters, Chocolate, Bananas … Viagra?
Don’t Put That in There!
It Will Really Turn a Woman On If You Do the Laundry
Don’t Leave Your Socks On!
Lose Weight Fast! Have Sex!
To Be or Not to Be … Pierced
Methuselah Had Sex Ten Times a Day
Squeezing Breasts Is All Fun and Games
Get Out of Those Pajamas!
Can’t Buy Me Love
Television Makes You Oversexed
It’s Only a Matter of Time Until a Man Cheats
There’s a Ten-Year Difference in Sexual Peaks
Only Teenagers Come Too Soon
Watching Porn Is a Guy Thing
Men Want It More. Way, Way More.
I Can’t Do That … It Will Give Me Hemorrhoids
You’ll Never Go Gray … Down There
Let’s Play Back Door, Front Door, Back Door …
Married People Don’t Play—with Themselves!
Women Are Turned Off by Sweaty, Stinky Men
When in Doubt, Double-Bag It
The Stiff Has a Stiff
Did She or Didn’t She? Faking It for Beginners.
Only Men Have Wet Dreams
Masturbation Will Make You Go Blind
Sex Can Give You a Heart Attack
Part IV: Getting Pregnant
You Can’t Get Pregnant During Your Period
If a Woman Has an Orgasm, It Is More Likely She Will Get Pregnant
You Can’t Get Pregnant If It Was a Rape
The Pill Will Make You Fat
Birth Control Pills Don’t Work as Well If You’re on Antibiotics
If You Put on the Pounds, Birth Control Pills Won’t Work
IUDs Are Horrible!
Want a Baby Girl? Turn This Way, Bend That Way.
You Can’t Get Pregnant If …
Part V: Sexually Transmitted Infections
You Didn’t Get That STD from Sex
But What About Crabs? I Know You Can Get Those from the Toilet Seat!
Oral Sex Is Totally Safe
Condoms Will Protect You from Anything
You Don’t Need the HPV Vaccine If You’re Not Having Sex
The HPV Vaccine Encourages Girls to Have Sex
You Better Not Kiss Anyone with HIV
Anal Sex Will Give You Cancer
References
Acknowledgments
Index
Also by Dr. Aaron E. Carroll and Dr. Rachel C. Vreeman
About the Authors
Copyright
Introduction
Who do you ask when you have a question about sex? Are there things about sex
you’ve always wondered about, but never dared to bring up with anyone?
Most of us have learned all sorts of things about sex. But, think about where
you got your information. You talked about sex with your friends, you learned
some basics from your sex ed class, you saw some interesting things on TV or
on the Internet, and you figured some things out from experience.
You may have plenty of information about sex, but we would bet that some of
it is wrong. People believe all kinds of things about sex that are just not true!
And even if you like talking about sex, you might not be as eager to ask
questions about whether your ideas about sex are correct.
People believe many myths, half-truths, and outright lies when it comes to
sex. When we wrote our first myth-busting book, Don’t Swallow Your Gum! we
included a whole section on myths about sex and getting pregnant. They were
hugely popular. When we wrote Don’t Cross Your Eyes…, we added some more
myths in this vein. Once again, the sex myths seemed to be the ones people
wanted to talk about most.
After all, who doesn’t love talking about sex?
Well … believe it or not, it was not our dream to become sex experts! Sex is
not all we want to talk about.
Aaron’s favorite story about writing our first myth-busting book is how much
he teased Rachel over her inability to defend whether “cum” should or should
not be spelled with a “u.” Ask her. Watch her blush.
Aaron has three kids who are still pretty young, and he has had a hard time
deflecting conversations about this book from them. His daughter, age seven at
the time of writing this, seems to be on to him, and is constantly pressuring him
for more information about the book.
Nonetheless, as pediatricians, part of our job is to teach adolescents about sex.
As researchers, our job is to help figure out the science about what works and
what doesn’t work to keep people healthy. And as professional myth-debunkers,
we can’t let you believe things about sex and your body that just are not true.
So, we overcame our inhibitions to shine some light (and evidence) on the
most popular and prevalent sex myths around. For those of you who are new to
these books, here’s how it all works:
One of the skills necessary to our job as health services researchers is to
understand health research and translate what it means for the general public. So
for each of these myths, we scoured the world’s medical literature, looking for
scientific studies to prove the idea true or false. You’d be shocked at how often
real research has been done on these topics. We bring the science to you, explain
what it means, and—more often than not—detail why these myths are or aren’t
true.
When you read this book, it’s important that you remember we do not just
want to give you our opinions. We’re showing you, through data, why we think
an idea is a myth. We won’t just tell you that myths aren’t real; we’ll show you
why.
This is the book that will answer all those crazy questions you have had about
sex. Plus, if you read it, you’re pretty much guaranteed to be the life of the party.
Our friends love just hearing the chapter titles in this book. Imagine how popular
you’ll be when you become the sexpert who can discuss them at length.
Some of the myths in this book are lighthearted fun. Others are deadly
serious. We apply the same research and scrutiny to all of them. If we can’t find
evidence, we’ll say so. But more often than not, science exists to tell us whether
that sex idea is true or myth. When there is science, we should use it. Get ready
for all of the sex science.
Happy myth-busting!
Part One
MEN