Table Of ContentCOMMUNICATING WITH MORE CONFIDENCE
First Published by Rowmark Limited in 2005
65 Rogers Mead
Hayling Island
Hampshire
England
PO11 0PL
Reprinted and Revised in 2007
Copyright © Pauline Rowson 2005, 2007
ISBN 978 0 9548045 7 2
The right of Pauline Rowson to be identified as the author of this
work has been asserted by her in accordance with the Copyright,
Design and Patents Act 1988.
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced
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Warning: The doing of an unauthorised act in relation to a
copyright work may result in both a civil claim for damages and
criminal prosecution.
Note: The material contained in this book is set out in good faith
for general guidance and no liability can be accepted for loss or
expense incurred as a result of relying in particular circumstances
on statements made in this book.
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Other Easy Step by Step Guides
Sales and Marketing Books
Marketing
Successful Selling
Building a Positive Media Profile
Writing Advertising Copy
Writing Articles and Newsletters
Are Your Customers Being Served?
Telemarketing, Cold Calling and Appoinment Making
Marketing to Win More Business
Personal Development Books
Stress and Time Management
Communicating with more Confidence
Giving Confident Presentations
Being Positive and Staying Positive (even when the going gets
tough)
Management Books
Motivating your Staff
Recruiting the Right Staff
Better Budgeting for your Business
Managing Change
Handling Confrontation
Writing a Business Plan and Making it Work
Negotiating for Success
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COMMUNICATING WITH MORE CONFIDENCE
Other books in the series
Publishing and Promoting your Book
Fundraising for your School
All the above guides are available from bookshops and
online, and as eBooks.
Rowmark Limited
E-mail: [email protected]
www.rowmark.co.uk
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About the Author
Pauline Rowson lives in the UK. She is the author
of several marketing and self-help books and for
many years ran her own successful marketing, PR
and training company. She is an accomplished public
speaker and is also the author of the popular marine
mystery series of crime and thriller novels.
Books by Pauline Rowson
Crime Fiction – Marine Mysteries
In Cold Daylight
Tide of Death – A DI Andy Horton novel
Deadly Waters - A DI Andy Horton novel
In for the Kill
Non-fiction
Communicating with more Confidence
Being Positive and Staying Positive
Marketing
Successful Selling
Building a Positive Media Profile
Fundraising for your School
Publishing and Promoting your Book
Are Your Customers Being Served?
Telemarketing, Cold Calling and Appoinment Making
Marketing to Win More Business
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COMMUNICATING WITH MORE CONFIDENCE
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Contents
Introduction...........................................................11
How to use this guide.........................................................11
What you will learn from this guide....................................12
Chapter 1
Anyone can communicate, can’t they?......................13
What is communication?...................................................15
What makes a confident communicator?...........................16
The benefits of confident communication........................18
When confident communication can help........................19
How can you improve your communication skills?...........21
In summary.........................................................................22
Chapter 2
Good communication starts within us.....................23
What influences us when we meet someone?................24
What about the internal factors that influence us?.............28
Values..................................................................................31
Prejudices.........................................................................32
Preconceived ideas.............................................................33
Handling criticism.............................................................35
Giving constructive critiscism..........................................38
Handling criticism in a personal relationship...................39
In summary.........................................................................42
Chapter 3
Building confidence.......................................................44
What is self-esteem?...........................................................45
How can we improve our self-esteem?...........................47
Your inner voice..................................................................50
In summary.........................................................................54
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COMMUNICATING WITH MORE CONFIDENCE
Chapter 4
Your appearance – clothes and grooming.................55
Clothes..........................................................................56
Colour............................................................................62
Attending an interview........................................................68
Giving a presentation.........................................................69
Good grooming is essential................................................71
Make up..............................................................................71
And finally… .....................................................................72
In summary.........................................................................72
Chapter 5
Body language – greetings and introductions..........73
Get the right inner voice....................................................74
Greetings and introductions..............................................75
Eye contact..........................................................................76
The smile............................................................................78
The handshake....................................................................78
The friendly handshake.....................................................79
Building rapport through the handshake..........................81
The dominant person’s handshake....................................81
The superior person’s handshake......................................82
In summary.........................................................................85
Chapter 6
Body language in different situations........................87
Entering a crowded room..................................................87
Look for the lone person....................................................89
Join a queue........................................................................90
What if you get stuck with the bore?................................91
Personal space.....................................................................92
Interviews..........................................................................94
Giving presentations..........................................................97
Overcoming nervousness..................................................98
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Meetings..........................................................................102
First, where to sit..............................................................102
Other ways to enhance your power at meetings..............103
Eye contact........................................................................105
In summary.......................................................................106
Chapter 7
Body language – posture, gestures and stance.........107
Beware mannerisms.........................................................108
Dominant or aggressive body language...........................108
Nervous body language...................................................112
Assertive body language...................................................114
In summary.......................................................................116
Chapter 8
Opening and structuring conversations..................117
Open questions................................................................117
Closed questions..............................................................118
Gender differences...........................................................121
How men break the ice....................................................121
How women start conversations.....................................123
Building conversations....................................................126
In summary.......................................................................131
Chapter 9
How we speak................................................................132
The structure of speech...................................................133
The four-part statement..................................................136
In summary.......................................................................143
Chapter 10
Watch your language...................................................144
Don’t be too apologetic.....................................................145
Tone, pitch and pace.........................................................147
In summary.......................................................................149
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COMMUNICATING WITH MORE CONFIDENCE
Chapter 11
Listening.....................................................................150
Casual listening................................................................151
Critical listening...............................................................151
What stops us listening?..................................................152
So how can we improve our listening skills?.....................153
In summary.......................................................................155
Chapter 12
Communicating with angry people.........................156
Get the right body language and inner voice...................157
What to do next................................................................157
The 7 Step approach to communicating
with angry people.............................................................159
But what if you’re right and they are wrong?....................160
How men communicate problems.................................162
How women communicate problems............................163
In summary.......................................................................165
Conclusion
Final checklist for communicating
with more confidence..................................................166
And finally… .....................................................................167
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Description:Communicating effectively should be the simplest thing in the world, we talk and listen - or do we? And is that all there is to it? When things go wrong in a company, a friendship, a personal relationship, communication or rather lack of it or misinterpreting it, is often at the heart of the problem
